A Message From Tim

~Posted on 6/17/2005~
It was just 365 days ago, that during our routine visit to our doctor, we were informed that Pia relapsed with AML Leukemia. And her only chance for survival what to get a bone marrow transplant, from a donor from the same ethnic race (since we had no match from her family or the NMDP Registry previously, when she was originally diagnosed). With without any delight, the day June 17, 2004, shattered our hearts, while the tears from our eyes continued to flow down our cheeks.

We had no idea what to do? Where to go? Nor How to do it? We just knew that we had to find a donor that would give Pia the Gift of Life. I remember going to the pharmacy that evening to get started right away on antibiotics and Antifungal drugs…looking at the pharmacist as she was wonder why Pia needed such powerful drugs after being in remission for almost two years.

Well a year later, things are different. First we were told to spend whatever time we had left together, to take it. As a match was is not in our cards anytime soon. Well for all those institutions that told me that, obviously did know me, or what I stand for. No hard feelings, but to I write to you all in mixed emotions of happiness and sadness. You see yes, we beat the odds so far and found Pia a match, an IDENTICAL match. She survived the transplant, as today is DAY 203, although suffering daily stomach pains (that affects what she eats causes her daily pain), SHE IS ALIVE, and grateful for every breathe of air she inhales everyday.

Today is also another milestone, as Rajan is going into transplant, and getting the chance for a new life (WE ASK YOU ALL TO PRAY FOR HIN AND HIS FAMILY TO CARRY THEM THROUGHT JOURNEY). It just can’t be a better day of hope. That make 6 matches, and 6 transplants that we have been able to facilitate since the start of our campaign. We are also so proud of all of our patients and patient families. Moreover the continuing “Act of Kindness” that we receive from all the strangers that joined the Registry to become a potential Live Saver.

On this day, Pia and I also celebrate the lives of all those patients that are no longer here with us on this earth, but with us in our hearts and minds. Nitha, Sagarika, Gurdeep, Anupama, and Varun. You and all your families have become our families. Today and everyday we will celebrate what all your lives meant to us on this earth, as you continue to watch over all your families and all those patients that still need our help. There is a special song that Pia and I have for each other, however, it so fitting to be shared for all the patients in our campaign, whether they are here or in heaven.

"The Prayer"

I pray you'll be our eyes, and watch us where we go. And help us to be wise in times when we don't knowLet this be our prayer, when we lose our way
Lead us to the place, guide us with your grace To a place where we'll be safe

I pray we'll find your light and hold it in our hearts. When stars go out each night, The light you have I pray we'll find your light will be in the heart and hold it in our hearts to remember us that When stars go out each night, you are eternal star when shadows fill our day

How much faith there's Let this be our prayer in my prayer when shadows fill our day
Lead us to a place, guide us with your grace. Give us faith so we'll be safe

We dream a world without violence a world of justice and faith. Everyone gives the hand to his neighbours Symbol of peace, of fraternity

We ask that life be kind and watch us from above We hope each soul will find another soul to love

The force his gives us We ask that life be kind is wish that and watch us from above
everyone finds love. We hope each soul will find around and inside another soul to love Let this be our prayer Let this be our prayer, just like every child

Need to find a place, guide us with your grace Give us faith so we'll be safe

It's the faith you light in us I feel it will save us

~Posted on 6/13/2005~
Time keeps passing and so do the hopes and dreams of survival. So what has happened since my last posting? So many things, where do I begin. For one, we have been very focused on Pia and several patients how have been going through many ups and owns in their treatment post transplant. It has really been tough for Pia these last few weeks with having severe stomach pains after eating. Sometimes this is one of the post transplant reactions for a patient, as the whole GI Track in her body is still sensitive and fragile. In addition, providing support to other families during our journey has NEVER STOPPED. These families, whether looking for a donor, getting a second opinion, finding a transplant center which best fits. Or just someone to talk to, we still go the distance everyday.

Our families were so honored to have been able to sponsor god’s blessings in hosting and servicing (god’s blessed food), on a very religious and auspicious day (Ramnami), at one of our most dedicated temples in New Jersey (Durga Mandir). This blessing was such a great opportunity to provide the post-ceremonial meal for a 1000+of some of the greatest volunteers and potential donors that believed in us, and joined our campaign. Most rewarding was the opportunity to have the elders in the community who helped us, meet Pia for the first time (for a brief moment, as Pia couldn’t expose Pia to large crowds, in the attempt to prevent any infections).

As some may know, in our Hindu culture, getting blessing from elders, can be compared to getting blessings from God. So many elders were proud of Pia and the cause for not just saving Pia’s life, but for potentially saving other members in the community too. What a REAL honor that day was for us.

Then there was Pia’s birthday, almost a year ago, we were told that she may never see her 30th., birthday and enjoy whatever time left you have with Pia. Well, we listened to those individuals, respected what they said, but would not accept their outcome. Almost a year later, Pia is here surviving everyday, continuing to help us advocate for all the other patients in need. Some say it wasn’t her time, others say it was luck to get a match, we say it was determination and the willingness of a community to not give up the fight for her life. The birthday was a real treat, as so many members of our family were in tears to see Pia make it to that day.

And the lovely emails we still get everyday, just confirms our original notion of if you educate humanity, humanity will rise to the occasion and help to save lives. Thank you to all again, for these wonderful wishes and cheery messages you send everyday. It is the consistent support of all of you that makes our commitment to this cause even greater.

With every cause there is such greatness to people in need, get the help they need. With that in mind, I would like to congratulate the Vyas family for all their handwork and dedication to Rajan. Yes, Rajan has a MATCH!!! He will be going into transplant June 17. We are ever so grateful to the wonderful mother who had the foresight to donate her cordblood to the National Cord Blood Program in New York. I want to personally thank Dr. Rubinstein and Clan Stevens for personally making sure this unit was ready for Rajan. In addition, very grateful to Hiral (Rajan’s aunt, who was our daily point person on this campaign and worked with us to ensure we found the right match for Rajan…Hiral what can I say you are AWSOME!!! Never stop the drive and commitment you have to Rajan). This Friday June 17th., please continue to pray for Rajan and his family, as they enter the next phase of their journey.

Lastly, I would share my heartfelt condolences with Deepak and Ramya, for the loss of their beautiful son Varun. You see, Varun was a very inspirational little boy. Upon starting a campaign for Pia last year, he and his family were one of the first patient families to join Matchpia’s awareness campaign. From the onset both our families bonded and relied on each other for support through this journey.

What can I say, Deepak, you and Ramya showed all of us in the community the importance of what parents will do to fight for their precious child. You fought from day one to the day Varun commenced his journey to heaven. I honor you both for sharing all your experiences with Varun’s treatment through your website. As we discussed, there is nothing I can do or say to bring Varun back in you mind, but I will tell you, you’ve made so many parents hug their children and understand how valuable life really is. Some say when an adult passes, their memory stay on the gravestone, but when a child passes, their memories don’t stay at the gravestone, but in the hearts of all those who loved them.

Deepak, we will never forget the love and awareness Varun brought to all of us, nor will Pia and I forget all the phone call we’ve had with you and Ramya the last 10 months. We join you two in celebrating Varun’s life for the strong happy boy he is. These are the experiences in life that will make us continue to bring further awareness to this cause, while helping to save lives for all those patients in need of a transplant.

~Posted on 5/06/2005~
The days carry on, and time has a funny way of just continuing without the consideration of all those who are running out of time. Thus far, our journey has been a remarkable experience full of so many ups and downs in life. One thing fortunate is all those well-wishers who still continue to pray for our journey in life.

It’s interesting to see how life and death, has a way to help prioritize what really matters in life. Some say it is a second chance, others say it’s a gift from above and there are some others who say it’s a miracle. Whatever it may be, we are grateful to all those who in someway touched us all the way, and remain to. Hence, I think that is why we continue to touch all those families that ask for our help (as we know what it was like, when there was NO ONE to help guide us as we started our journey).

Today is Day 161, Pia is doing well, as we still continue to integrate back to where we left off before her transplant in Seattle. The doctor appointments are still ongoing, and various tests are still conducted weekly to ensure the donor engraftment is still functioning the way we expected. It has been so remarkable to see Pia so supportive of the cause, and understanding all my involvement. You see there are a lot of calls in the late hours of the night, or during dinnertime or just about all hours of the day from patient families in need (whether they need help with their treatment or they just need someone to talk, when things are looking bleak…from all around the world). I just realized, that our involvement and dedication to this cause, are just part of our life’s now, it’s totally natural just to have conversations with patients all day on donor search and the transplant process (weird huh? somehow we’re getting accustomed to it).

It has been so great to know that there are 5 patients from our campaign who we’ve worked with to identify donor matches (whether it be bone marrow or cord blood). Four of those patients have had a transplant, and the last patient will go into transplant on May 11th. We are so proud to work and empower these families to go the distance for their loved ones. As for each family that goes through this process, they realize the gift of knowledge that was bestowed upon them, and it is the same knowledge they too will bestow upon the next family in need. Eventually, this cause will continue to thrive on the all the forefronts of every community, in every country. As a result, we will continue to increase and diversifying the pool of donors in all the Registry’s around the world, which will provide the opportunity for donors to have EQUAL ACCESS to life saving transplants everywhere.

~Posted on 4/22/2005~
Going from watching the boats come in and out of the Puget Sound in Seattle, to watching the squirrels and chipmunks scurry through the grass in our backyard, back in the east coast, time doesn’t stand still nor does it forgive those patients who are in need of a donor match. The only thing that is in favor of a patient is the kindness and generosity of an understanding community. A community that will embrace those that are in need of life.

After tremendous outreach to the community, we were able to achieve that level of understanding for Pia. Today, we continue our campaign to further educate our community of the importance of being a committed donor for all those patients that are still in need.

Today is day 147, and Pia is continuing to heal and get readjusted to the east coast. As strange as it is, any little deviation from being a normal person, just alarms us. Anytime she sneezes of coughs, we always think twice weather if it’s just a sneeze of cough, or whether it’s something serious (like Pia’s immune system being compromised). With this in mind, we continue to support all those families that seek our help during their journeys through finding a donor, and having a successful transplant.

We ask everyone to support all the families on our website, as they all need the same chance Pia got (the same support the community provided). I ask everyone to pray for Little Varun, as his health has suddenly started to deteriorated in the last few days (although he is starting to being heading back in the right direction, his body is under severe stress), while his parents fight for his life (Deepak & Ramya, we are all praying for you, and proud of all the hardwork you’ve both done to get Varun to transplant). Please continue to pray for Varun in his time of need.

Then there is Renu, who has done so much for our community as a Senior UN Officer (she played a significant part in the aparti movement in Africa). So far away from her home, and a way from her family and friends, she fights hard to make it to another day of hope. Renu, you can do it…you have the determination it takes to go the distance. Please continue to Pray for Renu as she fights to get into remission.

Also, there is a very special little boy (Rajan), who just turned seven days ago, and has inspired our community to come together very quickly to get donors tested all throughout the country. Although we have not meet Rajan, we know his aunt Hiral (doctor herself), who we’ve had the honor of working with the last several weeks. Rajan, our team is very proud of you and your families for helping our community to further bring this cause to the forefront of society at large. Please continue to pray for Rajan’s safe passage to remission, and finding a donor.

~Posted on 4/15/2005~
Can a community come together to make a difference? Does it matter what religion or gender you are? Why not make a difference to someone in need. Those were the questions that started my day today. Wonderfully enough, I received an email from a young woman last night, who I actually meet last year at a donor drive in New Jersey. She had seen us at about 5 events (in two different states), last summer, before got the courage to come forth to get tested (It was almost like she watched and watch, until she became comfortable with knowing that it doesn’t hurt, a it might actually save someone’s life). After seeing so many people getting tested, she noticed everyone had a smile in their face afterwards (it appeared to her that everyone had a sense of accomplishment, as they actually may be able to save someone’s life).

Finally, the day came (India Day Parade), where she stood on line and filled the “donor form”, and proceeded to get her blood tested. “It was simple, and now I know how empowering it could be”. Proclaimed Geeta. The story doesn’t end there, 8 months later, Geeta got called to be a potential match for a female patient with leukemia. “I went in to the donor center to give another sample of blood, and really see if I am a match…I hope I am…”, said Geeta. She concludes, by saying “Good bless you and Pia, for allowing me the honor of potentially saving a life”

I thank you Geeta, as we are all proud of you for sharing your story with our team. It is not always one can be so selfless in saving someone. As Geeta shared her story with us, I encourage anyone who has been contacted by the NMDP or Donor Center contact us, and let us know if you have any questions about the matching or donation process. Sometimes that will be the only way we know how many matches we are getting in our community.

Today is Day 142, and I really feel good knowing Pia is doing ok (she is slowly getting used to the east coast again), and everyone around us have been so supportive to the cause. It is very evident to me, more and more people are getting to know about this cause, hence, more people have been questioning how important this cause has become to our community, and how they can help. Whether it’s donating volunteering time, monetary donations, donation of services (like donating printing of posters and flyers or refreshments at drives), the word is getting out there, and the momentum is getting greater everyday… So to everyone…thank you for spreading the word, getting tested and doing drives…there are a lot of other patients who still need our help.

On another note, I would like to share some great news about our good friend Erin Zammett (editor at Glamour). Yesterday was her book party in New York, and what an event it was. There were some many of her dear friends, collogues and family at the event. Erin had CML, and is now in complete mission (awesome!!!), thanks to a wonder drug called Gleevec. It was an exciting evening to meet all the editors at Glamour (especially since they have been following Pia’s story, and very supportive to our campaign). Congratulations Erin, we know your book will be a big success!!!

Lastly, PLEASE watch Good Morning America (GMA) on ABC Network next Monday April 18th. (Yes, it was rescheduled again…please check the website to see the exact time). And don’t forget to send GMA an email, letting them now that how important it is to see stories like this, especially, since they deal with the severe health disparities of the minority community. Send your comments to: NETAUDR@abc.com

~Posted on 4/13/2005~
This weekend, I was reminded the importance of why we give to those who are in need. It was the Bat Mitzvah of a dear former student of Pia’s (and an equally important event for that dear student’s mother and family), who all wished so hard for us to be at this special occasion. Pia worked significantly hard to focus and gathering all her strength for this day, as this day not only signified a right of passage for her former student to enter adulthood in the Jewish faith, but also a significance for Pia to be there on that day (as this was one of her dearest students she had as a second grader).

It was amazing to see the pure enjoyment this now soon to be adult displayed, and her enthusiasm in giving back to society, and helping those that are less fortunate. She recited several quotes during her presentation to the audience, as she entered her adulthood experience (“It takes courage for a man to listen to his goodness and act on it”-Norman Cousins, and even honored Pia for all her teachings, and quoted Margaret Mead “Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world: Indeed it’s the only that ever does” ).

As I watched tears running down Pia’s eyes, knowing how proud Pia was of her former student (now dear family friend). It was amazing to see an example of a child, entering the “Right of Passage”, knowing the importance of giving to those in need. We are proud of you Hannah…and both Lois and Stuart for raising Hannah to appreciate all those in the world.

Today is Day 140, and Pia is fighting hard to regain the confidence of a patient, going back to a place that was once home. It is very tough and a challenging to know that you’re going to be safe, away from the doctors who cared for you and gave you safe passage through your transplant. So with great gratitude and strength, we continue to stay cautious and focused as continue to “travel this road less traveled”.


~Posted on 4/7/2005~
The phrase “Time is of the Essence”…what does that really mean? So many patient families end their message of assistance with that phrase. I remember myself stating the same phrase when I started this journey for Pia’s donor search. Well the only thing I can interpret, is that time is never at a stand still when it comes to cancer. We as patient families are in shock, once we realize our loved one has cancer, and the only way they can survive, is to find their donor match. That’s when it hits home, what do we do? How do we do it? and now what?

Those are the same questions I asked last June. But back then, there were no answers, and the landscape was unchartered. We had no choice but to rely on what we were told, and just wait and see, when a match would come. That’s when it hit our team, a match will never come to us, and we had to do everything, to make it come to us. Whether, it’s spreading the word in the community, doing donor drives, or finding out all the options for treatment at all the possible transplant centers. We had to be proactive, rather than reactive.

That’s what we had to do, and that’s what we did for Pia, and that’s what we continue to do for all the other patients who seek our help. Soon, this uncharted territory began to get mapped: we made relationships with the National Marrow Donor Program (NMDP), Donor centers and Minority Recruitment Groups, the media, the press, the transplant centers, the doctors and my most importantly the patient families (we had no defined support structure…hence, that’s what we had to create…patient families coming together…sharing war stories and seeking advice from each other). This is how Matchpia.org was born (a patient family sent us an email last week, in thanking us, for guiding their treatment “You guys have become the authority in the South Asian Community on this topic” said the patient’s father. My answer. “I don’t know about being the authority, but we had to learn how the process worked, and learn fast, in saving Pia and the other patients life’s”). And it is this “Time is of the Essence”, concept that still radiates within us, within every new patient family that seek our help (only a patient family really can experience the frustration and helplessness that comes with the unknown of finding a donor).

Today is Day 134, and the next leg of our journey has begun, Pia is back HOME. Some say, “Home is where the heart is”, I say, home is what makes you feel comfortable, a place where you know what to expect, and a place where the heart starts to heal in the harmony of family and friends.

Before leaving Seattle, we received the second greatest gift next to our donor, we got to meet two of the most wonderful people I have ever met in our lifes…two of the most important people who made “unrelated bone marrow transplants” possible. Yes, it was the Noble Laureate prizewinner, Dr. Donald Thomas and his wife Dottie Thomas, RN. They were the ones who persisted and mastered the successful science of this transplant. What an honor it was, to spend time with them, and personally thank them for contributing to society. They were very impressed with our efforts in bring awareness to the community, and registering more than 16,000 donors to the NMDP Registry. We were able to give them a preview of our new Public Service Announcements (PSA’s), while they pondered in great excitement to know that we have carried their mission forward to help bring further awareness in the importance of recruiting donors (especially the minority communities), to get tested for the NMDP registry (Dr. Thomas was one of the founders of the NMDP Registry). Again, Thank you Dr. Thomas and Dottie Thomas, for everything you have done in giving all these patients a second chance at “Life”. What a way to end our journey in Seattle on a high note.

So the day comes to leave, we continue to pack until the minute we left the apartment. As a last minute surprise, we were so happy to meet with a special patient family from Seattle. It was Gurdeep’s parents Mona and Karwarjit (two parents that cared so much for their child that they went to the greatest length to doing whatever it took to try to save their son’s life). You see these were the most exemptlatory parents I’ve ever met in our South Asian community. They fought very hard, every time the doctors said it was not possible, they found a way to make it possible, every time they were told the end was here, they helped Gurdeep, make to another week. What strength and character these parents taught us, in their everyday struggles to save their son. In the end, Gurdeep moved on to his next life in heaven, while we all try to move on in our life’s remembering what strength and sheer tenacity for life, he bestowed in all of us.

I will tell you, Gurdeep was a pleasure to talk to (he was so intelligent and cunning for a child, you can tell he know what was going on, but wanted everyone to stay strong, and remember him for his laughter and wonderful personality). Pia was so touched to talk to him before his last days here on this earth. The biggest guilt during our stay in Seattle, was keeping Gurdeep’s passing away from Pia (as everyone thought it would affect Pia’s mental state in healing). This was so hard for me to do, as I knew she would of wanted to be there for Mona and Karwarjit in there time of mourning. So the night before I told Pia, as I watched her in shock and sadness, wonder why Gurdeep didn’t make it, and she did. I explained to her will never know, but we shall never forget him and his family’s determination, for all they did in sharing Gurdeep with us.

Mona/Karwarjit, we will never forget both of you two, nor Gurdeep, as you all taught us so much about the love between a child and his parents. As we continue to help patient families, we will always remember what you’ve both taught us about fighting for whom you love. Every parent will learn from your example.

Later that morning, as our flight took off, I can see the sadness in Pia’s eye’s as we left our home away from home for the last 5 months (it’s often very difficult for a patient to leave the comforts of a safe zone). For this was the place that gave us a new Life. The flight was long, and shaky, but we made the best of the situation, as Alli was in the cabin with us. She was a hit, actually the flight attendants loved her, and couldn’t resist but to keep rubbing her ears. As hour eight came, the flight was stating to land (you can see the New York City skyline, and all the various bridges lit up in the night light), while Pia grasped my hand, as the tears ran down her eyes “We did it…we did it...I made it…I’m alive”, while the flight landed (you can read the white lettered sign “Welcome to New York” in big letters. We hugged each other with Alli in the middle, knowing that this leg of our last journey ended, and the next leg of our journey began (the next 1 to 5 years calls for a lot of caution as we are definitely not out of the woods yet).


~Posted on 3/29/2005~
Dear Matchpia.org Supporters,

I would like to take this opportunity to update everyone on Pia’s condition and other Matchpia.org initiatives. To start off, I would like to commend our donor in the UK, for her “SELFLESS ACT OF COURAGE”, and warmth in giving Pia a “SECOND CHANCE at life”. In reality, she also gave all of us a “SECOND CHANCE” to get to know Pia better now, and in the years to come. With this, I am happy to share GOOD NEWS, Pia will be discharged very soon (in the next week or so), from the care of the Fred Hutch Cancer Center in Seattle. Yes, that means we are heading home to pick up, where we left off in our lives (although, we are not out of the woods yet, we will continue to be cautious from keeping Pia infection free for the next 5 years).

There is additional the GOOD NEWS, about one of our team members, and South Asian patient, Meagan Jacob. Meagan has a match, and has undergone her transplant in Houston, Texas. I am happy to report that Megan is doing quite well, thanks to the efforts of our community coming together to support our national campaign. We are very proud of Megan and her family in continuing to fight so hard for her life.

Then there is Varun (we rarely call him “baby” Varun, as he is now one years old, and has grown up in front of our eyes, teaching many of us adults how precious life really is), who is STILL DOING WELL, and STAYING the COURSE to recovery. We are very proud of Deepak and Ramya (his parents for continuing to fight for his recovery).

These are some of the great updates of our patients who are still on course for recovery. However, I would like to stress the deep IMPORTANCE of all the other South Asian and Minority patients who we work with everyday, that are still in need of a donor match. We as a community have risen together to help Pia, Megan and Varun, and we cannot FORGET the other “FACES of HOPE”, that still need our help. It is this reason, both Pia and I , along with many volunteers, continue this cause to help those in need, as we were once in their same shoes looking for a match.

Our campaign has continued to grow more than ever, we are getting about 6,000 hits to our website everyday (from various states in the United States, and over 38 different countries around the world). We still need all your help…please get tested to be a potential donor match, continue to tell everyone you know the importance of getting tested, and help us conduct donor drives in your areas… With everyone’s’ help we can make the National Donor Registry better represented for South Asians and Minorities by increasing the chance of donor matches foe every patient in need.

Thank you all again, for your continued support in saving LIVES in our community.


~Posted on 3/10/2005~
It seems like everyday becomes clearer and clearer as to what needs to be done, to bring further awareness of this cause, however, for some patients, the time is often the factor that limits them for survival. So many patients are just too scared and unaware what the options maybe for survival. In the last 9 months of this journey, I have learned so much about the disease, treatment options, doctors, medical institutions, government, media, our community (complete strangers that just took a chance on us), and most important, the Heros…the patients/patient families (it is what brings us all together, in doing what we do). Not a day of rest has gone by, for me and so many other people, who just throw their lives into wanting to eradicate the pain of not having a donor match, especially, when you have no choice, but to have one. Well today is DAY 106, and the journey still continues to another day of hope, another day of Pia and all the other patients just fighting for their lifes.

Pia’s CMV is still present, and alarming for us to be very cautious of the affects of the treatment. It’s so interesting to see that sometimes the discipline of medicine is so hard to be predictable. Being on Ganciclovir for 5 weeks, has caused Pia’s counts to be low, so we may need to change to a different drug, that may not affect her counts as much, but still be strong enough to enable the CMV to be dormant in Pia’s body. As of now, her body is still like an enfant with no immunizations (very susceptible to infections disease).

It’s amazing to see the smile of courage on her face everyday, knowing that deep down inside, we don’t know what tomorrow brings. It’s this strength as a caregiver that makes me “Stay the Course” in working with the doctors and nurse everyday, to challenge the notions of “Have we done everything in our power?” ….”What else can we do proactive?”…”What are the options?”

So the days go on until we get more results that give us an indication that it’s OK to go home. A lot of our supporters have asked “You did it, 100 Days have gone by, Your done right?” Unfortunately, 100 days is the standard duration for stem-cell transplants, but to be on the safe side, it may take more time and patience to know that this leg of the journey is over, and the next step of the journey begins (usually another 2 to 5 yrs, before a patient is really out of the woods).

So yes, we made milestone of 8640000 seconds, 144000 minutes, 2400 hours or 100 DAYS, but the journey continues, the treatment continues, and so does the awareness and hope for everyone to find a donor match. As we continue to spread awareness and education of this crisis in ours and all the other minority communities, I ask everyone to keep spreading the importance of this cause to everyone you know, as knowledge will be a determinate to ignorance.

I would like to thank you all for all your lovely letters and emails, care packages, and all the love and prayers you’ve all shared for us and all the other patient families. It’s truly remarkable how so many people can come together from various races and various places to help those in need. I have never been so proud of my community, and hope we can all foster this sense of pride in everything we do make this world a better place.

~Posted on 3/3//2005~
Our faces glow, as we learn the news that Pia’s donor cells are engrafting at a very efficient rate (99%). The doctors have been so helpful in making sure we have understood the results of this journey everyday. Moreover, our head nurse Pat (who has been here for 30 years, and even witnessed the first unrelated bone marrow transplant in Seattle), who just constantly goes that extra mile everyday to make sure our journey here in Seattle goes smoothly.

Pia’s overall counts are looking good, however, we still need to ensure that her T-Cells (the cells that help to fight off foreign bodies that enter the bloodstream), counts are at an inappropriate (so far we are baffled that they are not), level. It troubles me to know to that we are in a wait and see state, especially since day 100 is coming around the corner (tomorrow). Other this big mystery, everything is going good, Pia is eating well, doing a lot of yoga, talking a lot of walks and spending time meditating and plying with Alli.

Today is Day 99, and it seems like this cat and mouse chase never ends, you help one patient family and do a search for a match, a donor drive, help them find doctor or transplant center and most important and time consuming of all, is to be there for them everyday as they go through their ups and downs (be cause you’ve witnessed those same feelings yourself during your journey). Call it a Task Force, call it a Support Group, or call it for what it is, Patient Families helping Patient Families…..that’s what a Community has become. And that’s what over 600 of you “direct volunteers” have helped us to create.

As for me, it seems like sleeping has become like an annual holiday like Thanksgiving or Christmas. Sleeping has come down to 3-4 hours a day of just closing my eyes and waiting for the sun to come up. I’ve noticed that the number of hours in a day are just too short, as compared to all the work we need to accomplish in helping all these patients. Someone said to me, just “hire a few people”…unfortunately, there isn’t enough funding to pay anyone, as I and my family have already spent over $200,000 to get the awareness out. And you can only ask people to volunteer their time and heart to the cause.

So the journey continues … as we hope to get some more news on for Day 100.

~Posted on 2/15/2005~
How life changes in matter of months, to a matter of days. Sometimes as we look into our lives, we can see so much turmoil and uncertainty, that the outlook on the future looks so bleak. And it is with this uncertainty that either makes us weaker, our gives us the hope to carry on and survive these challenges in life. A brief reminder on how life has changed our perspectives, in seeing what really is important, and how life needs to be reprioritized.

Yesterday was a remembrance of all the hope that carried us through finding a donor, to us continuing to recover today, tomorrow and into the next five years (5 years is usually considered the milestone, where a patient is considered cured). In addition, yesterday was Valentines Day (a day for the exchange of tokens of affection), for of us, and everyone else around the world, who celebrates it. I can tell you, that in the four Valentines Days I spent with Pia, this was by far the “Bestest” ever. This year we are grateful for all that life brought us. For this year, we share Valentine’s Day with a new person in Pia’s lives, as well as our new relationship with that someone special (the selfless donor, who saved Pia’s life). So whoever said “Two’s company and Three’s a Crowd”, must of forgot, that rule doesn’t apply to a patient who receives stem cells from a donor, as a donor can never, or ever be looked at, as an outsider to a patient, or patient family.

Although the day was well spent at the clinics getting blood tests, a bone marrow biopsy and skin biopsy, Pia was able to get home to get some rest before we started out for dinner. Dinner is always a limited choice outside the house, as you have to be very careful to go to places you know the food will be prepared from fresh products, as well as knowing that the food is handled properly and cooked fully. So going to new places on the whim is something that just doesn’t happen in our lives anymore.

Dinner was short, but tasteful. I think that we were both happier to be home, just resting watching a movie, knowing that Alli was nearby. So off we went home and exchanged our Valentines cards and gifts for each other (we both know, that the gifts were just a token of our gesture for the celebration of Valentines, but know that this day was just another day of celebrating our love for each other).

Before you knew it, the night just turned into a regular night of taking medicines and watching Pia fall asleep to the beeping noise of her hydration pump. So this was the closure Day 82.

~Posted on 2/11/2005~
Live is only as easy as we take action on. The difference between reality and perception is sometimes too great to comprehend. Sometimes when you question things in life, also, remember to question your medical treatment. Have I done everything possible to ensure all the answers given to me are accurate and the best possible solutions?

That is often the case for all of us trying to find hope in this journey for a donor. Today is day 79, and it is these questions, I ask myself as a caregiver everyday. It is these questions I ask every patient family to ponder on, for it could mean the difference between doing all you can and going the distance, vs., being complacent and accepting a gloomish outlook of the disease.

The CMV is still present in Pia, and still a concern for all of us. Watching her take the high dose of Ganciclovir, gets a little troubling for me, as Pia gets very tired and sleepy (reminds me of the days when she was on very strong chemo doses…it’s sad to see someone you love so weak and tired). This week has been very busy, as Day 80 is a big milestone for a transplant patient (as they start to get a lot of tests done, before the 100 Day release date). Hopefully this weekend will bring some rest for Pia.

Interesting milestone, as of today, our global cause has involved talking to patient and patient families in 19 different countries in 5 different continents. As they say in the Wizard of Oz, somehow, it feels like “we’re no longer in Kansas anymore”. Cancer is the same wherever you go, it’s the treatment that’s different. As we learned, cancer doesn’t discriminate by race, but it’s the treatment that discriminates by race and socioeconomics (clearly, one can see the difference between the haves and have-nots). So how does the minority communities compensate for these deficiencies? Knowledge…it’s the thing that always sustains us , and allows us to be part of an “equal level playing field”, in any culture.


~Posted on 2/5/2005~
As the clouds cover the water misty sky of the Puget Sound, you can hear of the commuter’s boats blowing their horns as they dock into port for the next set of passengers arriving to work in Seattle. It’s going to be a dark gloom day that will continue throughout the weekend. Today is DAY 72, and continue to stay focused during the remainder of our journey in Seattle.

Yesterday, the SCCA determined that Pia needed to start a new drug called Ganciclovir (an antiviral drug which slows the growth and spread of cytomegalovirus –CMV), to treat the new virus called CMV found in Pia’s white blood cells. You see, prior to transplant, Pia went under a very rigorous conditioning program here, where they learned everything about her body before the transplant (they established a baseline), and if any viruses existed, they would treat them prior to transplant, hoping to prevent and further complications during and after transplant.

It’s actually very common to have CMV as a normal person (over 505 of the population in the United States have CMV). The only thing that makes us concerned, is that Pia’s immune system is still suppressed so her donor cell continue to engraft. So if the CMV isn’t treated, Pia can get an infection and be really endangered for survival.

The doctors are cautious of this new finding, but know it was a matter of time before she would get CMV (we know Pia didn’t have CMV prior to transplant, but her donor did, so it passes onto Pia). By all means, we are not upset at our Donor, it’s a very common to have CMV. Actually most people get it very young, usually when they are exposed to a other little kids, who are sick in a daycare setting.

I must say though, we are very lucky to have some of the best health care professionals at the SCCA. Out lead nurse Pat, has been here since the first “unrelated transplant” in 1979 (when doctor Thomas and his team conducted the first transplant of this kind, right here in Seattle), and not only takes care of all our medical stuff, but treats us as, her own family. Our doctors her are also very attuned to every little thing that needs to be addressed (attending doctors rotate one month at a time).

One of the coolest things I heard during this whole treatment, was when one of the nurses yesterday, told us that the attending doctor was reviewing every patient in rounds, and when it came to Pia, paused and reminded the whole team, the importance of how patients really fight for the right to survive. He was so touched by the efforts it took a community, to find Pia an identical match. He mentioned “It took the Heart and Soul of one man in Love with a woman, to start a campaign which still continues far after her match and transplant”. He went on about what determination and strength it took this young man to overcome so many individuals that told him it could not be done, let alone, increasing the chances of finding a match for all the other South Asian patients lives’ that can be saved from this campaign. After everyone listened in total silence, he concluded, that it is this “Heart and Soul” that we should learn from, and carry on in everything we do as medical practitioners.

I watched the nurse tell us this, as I saw tears in Pia’s eye’s drip down her faintly red cheeks, while the nurse said, “You’ve set a good example for all of us to follow”. In sheer gratitude, I smiled and was so touched that one of the world’s leading doctors in transplants really took the time out to understand our community’s plea for help. Not only is he one of the world’s best known doctors, but one of the founding fathers of the NMDP. Thank you John, for all your guidance and support, you’ve given us from the first visit at Fred Hutch, to present day, for all your help and support to both of us during this journey. You have everyday, demonstrated your deep understanding for what patients/families really go through, while enabling us to better understand our treatment.

That evening, as I was really thinking about what “Heart and Soul” meant, and it reminded me of Billy Joel’s song “All about soul”. I realized that Pia is really my Heart and Soul, and the struggle of this journey gives us even more strength everyday to go on and continue to bring further awareness of this cause. I often think, maybe it is the Heart and Soul that keeps me focused everyday and night (as I strive to get more than 4 hours of sleep a day).

It’s late (1:00am), in the morning, and Pia has fallen a sleep the forth night in a row with her hydration pump on (it usually make an awful loud beep when all the fluids are done). As the light blinks and beeps, it’s usually my cue to disconnect the hydration from her Hickman catheter, and flush both her lines with saline and heparin (keep it very sanitized and infection free).

As I looked at her innocent face, in deep sleep, I just started remembering the words to Billy Joel’s song…

She waits for me at night, she waits for me in silence
She gives me all her tenderness and takes away my pain
And so far she hasn't run, though I swear she's had her moments
She still believes in miracles while others cry in vain

It's all about soul
It's all about faith and a deeper devotion
It's all about soul…

She turns to me sometimes and asks me what I'm dreaming
And I realize I must have gone a million miles away
And I ask her how she knew to reach out for me that moment
And she smiles because it's understood there are no words to say

It's all about soul
It's all about knowing what someone is feeling
The woman's got soul
The power of love and the power of healing…

There are people who have lost every trace of human kindness
There are many who have fallen, there are some who still survive
She comes to me at night and she tells me her desires
And she gives me all the love I need to keep my faith alive

It's all about soul
It's all about joy that comes out of sorrow
It's all about soul
Who's standing now and who's standing tomorrow…

It is this Heart and Soul in all of us, that keeps all of us going the distant, and gives us the strength to survive.


~Posted on 12/31/2004~
”Oh hark” , I think I see something, yes, it is…here comes the sun. Better late then ever, as the year comes to an end, the sun’s rays shine upon us for the last time this year, let everyone say good bye to all that warmth of the year, as we look forward to new beginnings in the New Year. Today is DAY 37, and it is so strange not to be with our family, in our home, in our part of the world, to end this year of challenges, hope and dreams…to the notion of a second chance at LIFE. I guess it doesn’t really matter whether we’re here or there…as long as we are together spend every precious time together (that is what our DONOR has afforded us…the chance for us to do all things one takes for granted, not ever facing this disease).

So it is this New Years Eve, I take the time to be grateful to GOD, my family, friends and COMPLETE strangers whom become the thick branches of our tree of HOPE. It is these branches that not only help us to grow, but help us to spread our message all throughout the US and the world. For it is my heartfelt thanks that immeasurable gratitude I take this moment to convey my indebt ness to you all.

-All mine and Pia’s family, friends and colleagues, who sacrifice every waking moment the past 7 months, to focus on find a match (all sacrificed birthdays, anniversaries, weddings, bridal showers, baby showers and all the other parties), for Pia and all the other patients.

-All the volunteers all around the US and around the World

-My Team Leaders in New Jersey/New York, Connecticut, Atlanta, Chicago, Boston, Virginia, Maryland, Washington DC, Florida, Tennessee, The Carolina’s, Alabama, St. Louis, San Jose, Freemont, LA, San Francisco, Dallas, Houston, Colorado, Louisiana, New Mexico, Massachusetts, New Hampshire, Maine, Rhode Island, Illinois, Ohio, Michigan, Minnesota, Kansas, Washington, Oregon, California and all the other States and Cities that worked with our Team on this campaign. And all the other countries around the world that “Spread the Word”

-All the Donor Centers of NMDP, several of the cooperative leaders of NMDP, and certainly, some of the supportive Board members of the NMDP, who embraced our efforts

-Our South Asian Celebrities, who have become ambassadors of this cause:

Manu Narayan - Lead actor from the award winning Broadway show “Bombay Dreams”

Ayesha Dharker - Lead actress from the award winning Broadway show “Bombay Dreams”

The Cast of Bombay Dreams – All the wonderful actors and actresses

Kalpen Modi - Talented South Asian actor, from movies like: Harold and Kumar Goes to White Castles, American Desi, Van Wilder, Malibu’s Most Wanted, Love Don’t Cost a Thing, A Lot Like Love and others

Parminder Nagra - Talented South Asian actress, from the smashing hit move “Bend It Like Beckham” and NBC’s “ER”

Ravi Kapoor - Talented South Asian actor, from NBC’s “Crossing Jordan”

Anan Jon – South Asian fashion designer to the “Stars”


-The media, ABC: Good Morning America with Diane Sawyer, CNN: American Morning with Sanjay Gupta, WNBC NY – with Vivian Lee, WABC NY – with Bill Ritter, WPIX NY – with Connie Chung and other South Asian Networks (TV Asia, VDesi, AVS, Chitrahar TV Chicago)

-The newspapers – Krista - Associated Press, NY Times, NY Post, New York Newsday, Washington Post, and hundreds of local market newspapers.

-The educational/government organizations – Who welcomed and endorsed our cause, NetIP DC, South Asian Associations in colleges and Universities, Congressman Rothman, Congressman Pallone, Senator Corzine, and Governor McGreevy.

-The NMDP Reauthorization Committee – Who have embraced our cause, and taken the time to receive the feedback of the South Asian Community, as it relates to funding additional outreach programs:

Senator Judd Gregg (NH) Senator Bill Frist (TN)
Senator John Ensign (NV) Senator Lamar Alexander (TN)
Senator Richard Burr (NC) Senator Johnny Isakson (GA)
Senator Jeff Sessions (AL) Senator Edward Kennedy (MA)
Christopher Dodd (CT) Senator Barbara Mikulski (MD)
Senator Patty Murray (WA) Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton (NY)

Together as a community, we have accomplished what some people might refer to as history, bringing so much awareness to a cause of SAVING PATIENTS in need, a cause that is so lightly discussed among our community and government leaders. I don’t personally call it history, but our commitment and devotion for Humanity. Our strategy was to launch a very effective campaign that can touch everyone emotionally, for the FIRST TIME in the history of our community, religion or gender didn’t matter anymore. Whether you are a male or a female, a Hindu, Muslim, Sikh or Christian in our South Asian community. It didn’t matter anymore, as the barriers of religion, needed to be broken-down in order to save lives in our community. Now the only thing that matters, is the compassion for HUMANITY, and all our commitment to sustain it.

I am very proud to be with such an empowering community of individuals, and it is this magical feeling of greatness that keeps Pia and I, so focused in keeping this cause alive for all those patients in need. I slightly pause for a moment, as I can remember 2004, “As it was best of Times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom….” The description I always remember from Charles Dickens “Tale of Two Cities”. The Best of Times, as we had so much fun planning our wedding and being with friends and family, the Worst of Times, as Pia relapsed from AML, and had no other chance of survival, but to receive heavy chemo therapy and with anxiously for a donor to be found, the Age of Wisdom, as everyone learned the power of Humanity. The notion “If you educate Humanity, Humanity will rise to the occasion”…this campaign has demonstrated that once people were educated on what a stem cell/bone marrow transplant was, and the process involved to save a LIFE…the choice was simple.

It is often asked of me why we continue this journey of bringing further awareness of the importance of education our community, and other minority communities. And I think the answer still remains the same, “Complete strangers took a chance on us, why shouldn’t we take a chance on complete strangers who too are patients in need “ And that is what has happened. It is true to the testament and think of one of Pia’s favorite quotes by Margaret Mead “Never doubt that a group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world…Indeed it’s the only thing that ever has”

With these words, I conclude on this eve of old memories, not to forget, but to thank our COMMITTED donor. Your strength has not only given Pia a second chance at LIFE, but all those who love and adore her.

-I thank you for letting us have a closer to normal life, as we have been living the pains and hardships of this disease for almost 3 years.

-Our family and friends thank you, for allowing them to love Pia all they know of her, and all that they will be able to learn from her in the future.

-The hundreds of children and families that Pia has worked with in the past 8 years of teaching at various schools.

-The entire community of volunteers, donors, patients and doctors whom from your kindness and example, will continue to save the LIVES of all the patients who are still in need of a donor match.

“Be the Change You Wish to See in This World” - Gandhi

And a special thanks to one of our most dedicated and supportive corporate sponsors, who have demonstrated social responsibility to our community. Without whom, we would not have this website and the ability to spread the importance of this cause around the world.

Diligent Solutions

~Posted on 12/26/2004~
It’s the day after Christmas, and what a mess…nothing but the pile of used dishes, utensils, servers, platters and napkins. It’s another wet misty morning in Seattle, with no sun in sight, but only the remnants of a Christmas gathering the night previous. I quietly got out of bed early, as Pia needed to get some extra sleep from being up late the night before. I looked at this big pile of things to clean, and again, realized that this is so much better that spending the night in a hospital, rather than having Christmas at home. Today is DAY 32, and the fun just begins. You see cleaning is nothing new to me, it’s a “systematic art”. You start off by putting the big things together, then the medium things together, and then whatever is left, in the dishwasher. I the swept the floors in both directions and mopped the floors in the opposite direction.

The part I haven’t spoke about in this leg of the journey, is the strict requirement of being cautiously clean and focused in preventing germs from hanging around. You see, as a transplant patient, you need to make sure you live in a very clean environment, staying away from any possible infection. We have to make sure Pia has fresh towels everyday, the floors are swept and mopped, the furniture in all the rooms are dusted, carpets vacuumed, all the kitchen counters and sinks clean at all times (with a Clorox solution). The fridge spotless clean in the inside and outside at all time too. Also being very careful in preparing food, storing it, heating it up, let alone eating it. On the other end, bathrooms showers need to be cleaned everyday, toilets and sinks scrubbed and cleaned too. I think we get a little too carried away, but with an immune system of a baby, why take the chance right? So getting back to my original point, cleaning is not really a big deal as one thinks it is, the big deal is making time everyday as a Caregiver to ensure it gets done.

As a few hours pass, the apartment is back in its usually state of cleanliness, Pia awakes with a ferocious appetite to eat. So glad for her hunger, we make pancakes, toast, eggs and anything she craves, as hunger is always good to have, as it’s a good sign that she is getting better, and close to normal. And night she needs to eat as much as she can, to becoming close to her normal self. The day goes on, and we reflect back on the previous nights events to realize how fortunate we are to be healthy, feed, and having shelter above our heads.

~Posted on 12/25/2004~
”So this is Christmas, And what have you done, Another year over, and a new one begun…” as the clock radio a woke our sleep. Today is DAY 31, and this is Christmas Day. The day is full of cloud and mist, whereby you could see no traces of life on the waters of Puget Sound, but only the occasional Seagull flying by the window ledges of the apartment looking for food. We wake the joy of knowing we are together, under the same roof, instead of the hospital.

With some coco in hand, we both start to exchange gifts with each other (deep down inside, we both know the greatest gift of LIFE, has already blessed us, and any other gift from each other are just tokens of our love for each other). In a matter of an hour, all the gift are given and unwrapped, even all our “Merry Christmas” calls back home were already accomplished. After taking all of Pia’s medicines, and starting her hydration (she is still on hydration, and will be for a while as one of the medicines process too much Magnesium from her liver causing a deficiency. Until the deficiency is overcome by sustaining production from her own body, Pia must continue the hydration of magnesium through her IV solution). We start to prepare for the night’s dinner, Yes, we are having guests for dinner…yea!!! Rujuta and Vivek (our Seattle family), are joining us for Christmas dinner.

Pia and I spend the whole afternoon cooking dinner for our guests, as well as for complete strangers. You see, Thanksgiving and Christmas are the two holidays we always celebrate with strangers who are less fortunate than us. We usually spend time in the afternoon giving out sandwiches and warm beverages to what some refer to the “Homeless”, while we refer to them as the “Less Fortunate”. This year on Thanksgiving, Pia just got her transplant, so I went solo and handed out the sandwiches and warm beverages in the streets of downtown Seattle instead of our usual streets of New York. Now almost 4 weeks later, Pia will join Rujuta , Vivek and I in making and handing out food to all those who deserve a meal tonight (let alone every night…sometimes I feel sad that, we as caring humans, only help those in need during the holidays, instead of everyday…).

So as we finish assembling the sandwiches and head to the coffee shop to get 30 large coffees (the only place open was 7 Eleven), we loaded everything in the car (the faces of the employees of the 7 Eleven, were so surprising as we were probably one of their biggest customers of the day), and headed through the streets of downtown. At first it was hard to determine who was in need and who were just passer byes. But soon we could tell the difference. With time, we started handing out the sandwiches and beverages to complete strangers who were just so happy for someone to just talk to them, let alone feed them. In a matter of minutes, with the cold chill of the wind blowing in the damp Seattle night air, we saw a large crowd of people taking shelter underneath a highway overpass.

As we proceeded to the area and got out of the car (I cautiously looked around, as Pia was with us and was feeling good enough to observe, and even hand some sandwiches out, while I made sure we were away from anyone who looked sick or coughing). The crowds started getting big as a group of 10 to 15 people saw us handing food out, and further spiked an curious interest of others to seek refuge in us, to help them in a time where no one should be a alone, especially without a meal. Many “Thanks you’s” and “God Bless You’s” were spoken by these strangers who welcomed us into their space. I watched and observed the faces of Pia, Rujuta and Vivek, as everyone knew this was a start in “helping those in need, as we have everything we needed”.

Night falls, and we headed home to a wonderful meal in a warm apartment, with all the comforts of home (for some reason, after watching all those who wouldn’t of had a meal tonight, if it wasn’t for us, I felt like I didn’t do enough to help all those in need…maybe we should of made more sandwiches…maybe we should of looked for more people). Anyway, the dinner started with Pia reading a poem about how “blessed this home is”, for not just the food we are having, but the company that make this home so blessed.

Dinner continued late into the night, as I think we used every pot and pan, dish and bowl, and every last utensil to make this event happen. As the night came to an end, and our guests left, Pia and I talked about not only of all the people that we touched tonight, but all the people who touched us in our campaign to find a donor…we held hands and said a prayer for each volunteer, donor, patient, the media, the government for all their sacrifices and commitment in bringing further awareness of this crisis, and saving lives in our community. Moreover, to our selfless COMMITED DONOR, who we’ve begun to LOVE as Pia’s newest sister.

“And so this is Christmas, For weak and for strong, For rich and the poor ones, The road is so long”

~Posted on 12/24/2004~
Today is Christmas Eve, and the time has definitely been passing quickly. You can see all the streets full of last minute shoppers, as they hurry to get their loved ones last minute gifts. Today, we arrive at the clinic to get our last check-up until next week (4 days later), after the Christmas holiday. You can tell it was the holidays as things looked pretty quiet at the clinic (looked like a skeleton crew was on hand as they expect a very small number of appointments today). Today is DAY 30, and the check-up went fine, we proceeded to thank all the members of our medical team and passed out some gifts out, as our token of appreciation (all the various teams, blood draw, schedulers, pharmacy, nurses, physician’s assistants and doctors…who work so hard day in and out at the SCCA to make sure Pia is doing well).

As we left the clinic, I could help but to see is a slight disappointment on Pia’s face. I don’t think it was just the fact that our family back in the east coast are not going to be around, but also the fact that this year we could not have a real Christmas tree. As at this point of the treatment, it is very unsafe to have a plant in the house (as they may have a fungus or bacteria in the dirt that might cause Pia to have a infection). So real trees are out (you see back home we would always get a real tree on Christmas Eve, decorate it, and put presents all around it that night). Last year we spent Christmas with our family, the year before we spent it together during a snow storm (of course we had to drive around to find one of Pia’s medicines that night, 5 towns away…since it was the only place open on Christmas, but at least we ended up at home that night).

So this year no real tree, however, I decided that we had to find something instead, and insisted we drive around to find some kind of artificial tree that will symbolize Christmas for us. Sure enough, we drove store to store until we came a cross the sorriest looking artificial tree (s) (It reminded me of a “Charlie Brown” Christmas Tree). I dashed for the cashier as the store was closing and we ventured back home (I knew by this time, Pia was really missing back home and especially our family).

With the joys of Christmas carols on every radio station is Seattle, we headed home and unloaded the car. That night as we put up our tree, we listened to the sounds of a Bing Crosby Christmas CD, while we finished decorating the tree and watched Alli in amusement as she was sniffing the tree (I think she was wondering how strange humans are to idolize a fake tree once a year, as a central theme in one’s living room). By now the presents appeared, and the for once, it felt like Christmas (even though we were thousands of miles away).

At the stroke of midnight, we proceeded to exchange one gift (our tradition is to exchange one gift at midnight and open the rest after we wake Christmas morning), with each other as we both know, even without our friends, family and the safety of our home, this would be the greatest Christmas ever. For this year we received the greatest gift that anyone could ever GIVE or RECEIVE, the GIFT of LIFE… And with the end of one night, and the beginning of another, we take the opportunity to thank God, for giving the unconditional strength to both our donor and Pia. To our DONOR, for the selfless act of giving the ultimate gift of LIFE. And Pia, for the strength and courage to sustain the much-needed focus to survive, and still continue to fight for LIFE everyday…as everyday is now another day of LIFE.

~Posted on 12/23/2004~
The morning of DAY 29 arrives, and the clouds start to linger around the Puget Sound. Out in the distant, one can see the reflection of some dark color metal in the cloudy misty sea (the weather is so cloudy and misty, all one can see is the mist covered water of the Puget Sound as if everything beyond a hundred yards become the vast Pacific Ocean). Pia wakes to a hearty appetite. She had dreams of pancakes with strawberries and well-done Vermont beacon (you know the type that has a lot of flavor, but little fat), unfortunately, she knew that if she could just hold done some toast and tea, the day would be off to a good running start.

After breakfast, we start Pia’s hydration via the home pump. By now, taking 10-12 medicines in the morning and at night, it’s becoming a tiring fade, like last year’s boot flared jeans. The day progresses and the weather gets dimmer and dimmer, and Pia’s level of energy starts to diminishes, as Pia gets tired and cranky. We quickly run to the clinic, as today Pia gets a bone marrow aspiration to determine the state of her engraftment and whether there is any residual leukemia left in her body. Before the procedure, Pia usually takes an Adivan to control the nuashia and nervousness, and litacain in the area where the needle will puncture her skin (most of the nurses are shocked at the fact that Pia doesn’t take any other form of sadation for this procedure…most people think it is so painful, that they go under, or even have a strong sadation).

The procedure went great, as we got a detailed play by play from all three of the nurses involved in the procedure. One nurse performed the aspiration, another observed (quality control), while the last nurse took the blood sample and made slides of Pia marrow. Great job guys and thank you so much giving us the details. Directly afterwards, Pia rested for 20 minutes in the rest area (to make sure she was ok to leave). Shortly there after, we head home so Pia can get some rest. It was evident that time has come for to take a nap. Later, after waking from her beautiful sleep Pia realizes, it’s time for me to take a walk and do something for myself (as that’s what I have been telling all the patient families that are going through what we are). So once again, I wander to the center of town to see what gifts lurk to the liking of Pia for this Christmas Season. Soon enough can see all the long lines as all the little children wait on line to take a picture with Santa. I paused and for a moment thought how all my nephews and my niece are doing, I wondered what Christmas would be like this year, not being there for the annual family gathering in the east coast. All of a sudden, it dawned on me, Pia and I were not going to be home for the holidays this year (at that point I felt a sudden sense of sadness, but realized that I should be grateful what I have, instead of what I didn’t have…we both have a second chance in life..what more can we ask for).


~Posted on 12/22/2004~
Another day healthier, and another closer to DAY 100. As the streets get even crowed, and the masses run in and out of stores to get their holiday shopping done, we carefully navigate to get to our next clinic. It is DAY 28, and for some reason, the Sun decides to pay us a visit today. Pia is feeling better and better as the days go by. Her appetite is in fact getting better as she starts to try digesting some more solid foods like potatoes, carrots and even some meats. I can still see the look on Pia’s face as she still wonders to herself how she made it so far in so much pain. The remnants of the Mucocitis still remain in the form of mouth sores and red and white sores in her mouth (good oral hygiene is still important in order to fight bacteria and stay healthy).

After coming home, I prepare Pia’s lunch and hydration (yes, she is still receiving hydration via the home pump), so she can eat and rest for the afternoon. As noon approaches, Pia falls into deep sleep for the rest of the afternoon, all cured-up in a ball on the couch. As she slowly wakes, it’s evening and almost time for dinner. Tired and groggy, she remembers that it’s time for me to head out and once again start our Christmas shopping. This time she smiles and says have fun and don’t come home unless you bought some presents for me.

Knowing that she is all right, I prepare her dinner, and head off for he center of town. It was kind of lonely to go alone, but I just tried to keep focus on the task at hand so I can get back to Pia. As I was leaving the building, I noticed a Indian couple waiting in the lobby (they must have been waiting for a resident in the building), I took a double take as I thought they were someone I knew fro New York (Sarita and Shiva Kumar). I got so excited and almost tapped the women on the shoulder.

Just then she turned at me, and I realized it wasn’t them after all. What a great surprise it would be if it were them. I’ll tell you, I only meet so many people in life that really care to make a difference in your life, and for Pia and I, Sarita and Shiva are one of the extraordinary bunches of folks that do. You see, I met Sarita and Shiva at a drive for Pia back in mid July, just two weeks into our campaign. They got tested (and actually knew Pia’s parents from the past), assured me that things will be OK, and God is watching.

And slowly without and effort from my side, they became involved in doing donor drives and spreading the word. They even went as far as setting up a drive in one of the oldest temples in the US (in Maryland), and even spent the weekend there leading the drives. We would see them often at drives, just fitting in, and smiling, always giving us heir blessings for hope. One day I we were at the Indian Day parade in NY, as both my brother and I were setting up our media equipment in a south Asian Street fair (we always s show a DVD of Pia’s journey at every drive so people can visualize what a patient feels), our gas generator that gave us supply blow up I mean in steam and smoke, but yet my brother and I didn’t give up. As Shiva, looked at us and said now what, no power no media, we heard a roar of a generator just nearby. Quickly my brother asked if we could share in the power source (we ended up give the owners of the generator an extra extension cord in exchange for use of their power source…and went on with the show).

At that moment, I’ll never forget Shiva’s face as he thought both the Dutta brothers were crazy, but did whatever it took to get the job done. It was an eventful day, but I will never forget the support that Sarita and Shiva gave us…still to this day they pray for our safe passage home. THANK YOU BOTH for all you do for Pia and I, and most importantly, all the patients that need our help. Random luck brought the Kumar’s to us, but now faith, strength and support keeps them near us.

~Posted on 12/21/2004~
The morning rises to another day of wet misty rain, yea it’s raining again… Pia slow rises from the depth of sleep, as we get ready to go to clinic. Usually, daily visits to the clinic are welcomed (as they give us an indication of how Pia’s progress in going), but today, it was as if Pia didn’t want to go to school, as her stomach was still hurt so much.

Holding her pain in, we proceeded out journey to the clinic by car (taxi cabs are no longer allowed, as they have to much floating germs in them…not good for someone that has no immunity). For the first time, I really notice Pia gaze out the window, as if she was a child again looking at the clouds, during her first journey on a plane. It was good to see what freedom meant to a patient, as I drove towards the clinic, saying a little prayer to myself, in the hope that she stays healthy and doesn’t ever have to be admitted back into the hospital again.

This brings the beginning the day of DAY 27, and although she still has some stomach pains (the medical team assures us that all of Pia’s test levels are fine, and these pains are her stomach retraining it’s self to digest again). Other than that, Pia is performing like a true champ at this time. Heading home we see all the white lights around all trees in the center of town, the crowds still large, gathering in clusters along all the stores. And what makes it even more real, is the radio in the car, as we hear the song “Feed the world, let them know it’s Christmas time”… I can see the glow in Pia’s eye, as I know this Christmas will be the most meaningful one in both her and my lifes’ (for this year, the greatest gift of LIFE was given to us).

We arrive home, and just as we get in the elevator, we get our mail (lot of cards from well wishers, and a package addressed to Pia). Back in the apartment, we open the package and find a gift basket of desserts and chocolates with a baby moose stuffed doll. The message reads, “ You are a brave girl, we are so proud of you!!! With love the Basu family”. What a treat, as you see, when Pia relapsed, and I put her in Sloan Kettering and hit the road with my friends and family to do donor drives, our first large drive was a Bengali Cultural Conference in Baltimore, Md. That is were Mr. And Mrs. Basu, very close friends of my parents got tested to be a potential bone marrow donor. Infact, I will never forget, Mrs. Basu insisted on being the first person to get tested for Pia (I think both to show everyone that it is easy and painless, and really wanting to be Pia’s match). That whole weekend, the entire Basu Family devoted their time to manning the donor booths to help Pia and the other patients looking for a match. THANK YOU BASU FAMILY for supporting us from DAY 1, you guys are a “perfect example” of what a real friendship is all about.

~Posted on 12/20/2004~
The weekend continues, and the idea of Pia’s presence home is becoming more and more a reality. Finally she is resting properly in the night (the stomach cramps are getting less day by day). Today, I introduce Pia to a different kind of breakfast, one that involves bread. Yes, she will have her first opportunity to eat lightly heated toast like a normal person would have in the morning (not saying that everyone eats toast everyday).

You can se the smile on her face to spell the aroma of tea and toast for breakfast (in addition to her 10-12 different medicines). The day is yet another gloomy rainy day, but at least it is one at home instead of the Hospital. Today is Day 26, and we are planning to leave the house for a quick walk, and a short drive around town (we needed to get a few things to send back to the east coast as Christmas gifts). With a few hours spent in and around town, we head home to get Pia her meds and get her into bed for the night. Somehow, just having a simple day, is getting to become the common theme for this week (the first week home from the hospital).

~Posted on 12/19/2004~
The weekend is here, I used to so look forward to the weekends as those were the only two days out of the week that I was able to be in the same location as Pia (as I traveled all week at a client location). Weekends were so different, as I didn’t have to think about running to catch a flight home or even worried about the weather as it always delayed me from getting home. The weekend was all about being with Pia (of course also playing fetch with Alli’s mousy around the house too), and spending time together, before jumping on a flight Monday morning.

This is the first weekend that Pia is home from the hospital (today is DAY 25), and what a relief to have her sleep in late without the interruptions of loud beeping noises of the IV pump ringing (reminding us that the pump is empty, and it’s time for the next dose). Pia wakes to a morning of slight discomfort, as get ready to go to the clinic to get her dressing checked by the nurses (remember the Hickman catheter that was surgically put into her chest, well the tube that is hanging out needs to be thoroughly cleaned and covered everyday before and after taking a shower…making sure the are is not infected).

The nurses examined the dressing, and showed us how to do the dressing again (even though, we learned how to do this in the caregivers class before…it’s always good to get a refresher).

After two hours at the clinic, we head home so Pia could rest the remainder of the day. Unfortunately, the stomach pains still exist and Pia appetite is still a little shakey, as her body is still relearning to digest food again. After a good nap and meal, Pia is feeling well, and asks me to get out of the house and do something for myself….go shopping…do something, besides taking care of me.

I sit and wonder, what should I do? Where do I go? All I know now is how to be a caregiver and an advocate for other patients. Pia convinces me to leave the apartment and go have some fun Christmas shopping. So with great force, I leave the apartment and head towards the center of town where all the shops are. It was so wired to smell the air of the cold winter, while I hear the Christmas Bells and roars of the large congested hoards of people moving form store to store.

Somehow, I can see it was Christmas, but didn’t really feel it to be Christmas. As now all the fond memories of home start to flash through my mind, wondering what Christmas would be like if we were back in the east coast with our family. I went from shop to shop, looking for some ideal gifts for Pia and my family and friends, but finally succumbed to the notion that I wasn’t really in the mood to go shopping, I just wanted to be back in the apartment with Pia (as this is the first time I am away from her, since she has been home).

I then decide to head home, know that’s the place I really want to be (knowing that the best Christmas present this year, was the notion of a second chance at LIFE). As I knock on the apartment door, Pia opens it’s quickly (as if she waited by the door all night for me to come home), and embraces me as if I was gone for a long time, and I just found my way home.

To all our supporters, as the treatment for Pia has gotten very time consuming, as well as helping the other patient and Patient families through their treatments, I have been slightly behind in updating our web log. I am deeply apologetic, as I know this is for most of you, the only source of knowing what is happening with us. I will work very hard in the next week to catch-up with updating you all. Please watch for more entries the next few days… Thank you for your patience - Tim

~Posted on 12/18/2004~
We wake to the howling screaming winds, which circulate through the slight cracks in the lightly insulated windows of the apartment. With no sun in sight, but constant fog, the day starts out to yet be another day of gloomy rain. The stomach pains are slightly relieved, as the medicines are working. Pia has graduated from light clear liquids to slightly thicker soups (like butternut squash).

Running late to our afternoon clinic (today is DAY 24), we rush through the rainy traffic jams to make our appointment. The doctors are somewhat impressed that Pia is handling her transition back to the apartment quite well, as she did have an unrelated donor match (no one in the family was a match, so our donor is not related to Pia). The verdict…yes, she is doing all right, but we need to proceed with direct caution. The doctors are still trying to establish a baseline as to what all of Pia’s medicine doses will be (as some of the medicines metabolizes quicker than others, hence made loose some of it’s effect on the body…in this case the dose may have to be increase to accomplish the same job). The clinic visit went well, so now head home so Pia can get some food and rest. I drop off at home and start her hydration (via the in-home pump). And ventured out to do some groceries.

Once I got to Larry’s (grocery shop near Queen Ann are of Seattle), I start to collect all the provisions, which will enable Pia to heal, as she is tired of broth and soups. As I was reaching the cashier, I remembered that the last time I was here with Pia was on November 5, when Pia’s match was released all throughout the world on Associated Press (they have been very good to us and the South Asian Community, in really taking the time to understanding the crisis in our community, and reporting it to the public at large…hats off to a socialally responsible journalism group). We actually picked a few copies of the USA Today, Seattle Times and Seattle Post Intelligencer, which all depicted Pia’s story, and the struggles and challenges of South Asian Patients to get a match (it was like having one of those memory flashes, of how grateful you are at life for a second chance).

As I checked out and started heading for the door, I heard the bells of the holidays ring, as there was a less fortunate homeless women with all of her possessions looking for her next meal. She had a soiled face that looked so needy (it reminded of me watching the old classic story on John Stein beck’s “Grapes of Wrath”…as you felt how unfortunate people were doing the days of the great depression, looking for their next meal). The irony was, this women had a cardboard sign hanging around her neck, it said “Homeless in America, the people in Iraq got a second chance, Shouldn’t I have a second chance too?”

Amazing to see this sign and another woman in need, just as I recognized what a second chance in life meant for Pia and I got. I proceeded back into the store and bought her a precooked turkey meal with all the fix’ins (I had it warmed up), got her some drinks and proceeded towards her. I walked up to her and asked her if she wanted something, she smiled as I handed her the dinner bag. As she pulled of the food, I could see her a small smile as she saw the packet of Handi-Wipes that I also bought for her (for it was quite, that it must be difficult to shower, as she probably moved from place to place), as if you can see that was such a treat to get a complete meal and wipes. She wiped her hands clean and thanked me, as I asked for her name (she curiously wondering why I asked, and replied “Amanda Jackson”). I smiled and said, well Miss Jackson, enjoy your meal and have a Happy Holiday. She looked at me with disbelieve that this was happening, and said “God Bless You…”

I walked away with a smile, and said a prayer for her that God may protect her safe passage as God protect Pia and I.

~Posted on 12/17/2004~
The morning rises to another day of wet misty rain, yea it’s raining again… Pia slow rises from the depth of sleep, as we get ready to go to clinic (after discharge from the hospital, we are required to have follow-up visits at the outpatient facility of the SCCA, where we have daily visits with various doctors and nurses). Usually, daily visits to the clinic are welcomed (as they give us an indication of how Pia’s progress in going), but today, it was as if Pia didn’t want to go to school as her stomach was still hurt so much.

At the clinic, the lab results showed that the cramping and diarrhea in Pia are attributed to a bowel infection, or Graft vs. Host. So she has to start the Vancomycin immediately, to see how her body reacts. Today is Day 23, and survival is the key phrase of the day. Pia still feels very tire from leaving the hospital, as the withdrawals from the painkillers are tough for the first week I’m told. Fortunately, Pia is able to swallow some soup and some fruit smoothies, as we are happy to see her hold any food in her system.

The vomiting is still present, but at least her body is reconditioning to the process of eating and digestion again. Today, Pia’s dad leaves for the east coast…boy he was real good help the last week. It’s strange, but I really thing somehow our relation through this time of crisis has gotten stronger, to where he knows and feels secure that we are getting the best treatment for Pia in Seattle. I often think what I would do if I was in his shoes… the night nears, and Pia is stable enough to eat and talk. We decide to watch “The Apprentice” on TV (a show that both Pia and I watch regularly…even days ago when I was always out of town on business, on Thursday nights, I’d always be back in my hotel room watch the show with Pia as we discussed the events of the day. Too many of my friends and colleagues think I should be on the show on day, they feel I know how to get things done at the end of the day. I don’t know about that, as Pia’s is my primary focus, but who knows maybe one day).

As the show concludes, and it starts to become late night and again, we start the medicine regiment (8-10 different medicines), so Pia can prepare for the night’s sleep, while I start to prepare for tomorrows clinic and figure out which South Asian patient need what tomorrow.

As I was catching up on the day’s events, I got a wonderful email from a good friend, who’s really become a family member to us. Her name is CarolAnn Baldwin, a NMDP recruiter for one of the biggest donor centers in the US (New England). I met CarolAnn at one of our drives, and let me tell you, ever since, she has been one of our greatest champions to the South Asian Community. She has proactively helped our campaign night and day for the last 5 months. I don’t what to say, but how grateful we are for all you do for us (Matchpia.org), moreover, for all the patients out there that are looking for a donor match. You are one of the finest individuals I have ever come across.

Today, as almost everyday other day, she sent me an email on how precious life is, and how sometimes we really forget what life is all about. Especially, during the holiday season when there is so much going on with cooking, gift wrapping, toy drives at the local supermarket, and taking angels off the Christmas tree at church to buy a gift for someone, “sometimes we get so immersed in our own holiday, that we forget the real people who might not have a Christmas…That’s when I think of people like you and Pia. Its not the gifts it’s the family and friends that truly make the holiday special”. She further tells me that her daughter who has pretty long blond hair (you the type that is so straight and has every strand perfectly in place), commented that she wanted to cut her long hair one day to make a wig for someone who needs hair, someone like Pia (she saw Pia’s DVD, her hair falling off). Her daughter offered Pia the opportunity to change her hair to blond. It’s so precious to see how children are so resilient and thoughtful when it comes to such serious topics as cancer and life and death.

With no doubt CarolAnn, you and your family are the perfect example of how an “Act of Kindness From a perfect Stranger”. For 5 months ago, you were a complete stranger to us, and now you and your family are at the epicenter of our life’s. Thank you for doing so much for Pia, myself and the whole South Asian Community. You have certainly gone above and beyond as an NMDP Representative, let alone any human I’ve ever met.

~Posted on 12/16/2004~
The whole night felt like a rerun of a “Sleepless in Seattle”, as no sleep was ever accomplished for Pia, nor myself. I guess for me, I just didn’t know what to expect from Pia, as this would be a night without any nurses at her side, and let alone the warm the and shelter of pain killers through IV. The morning was rough, as Pia was so tired from the lack of sleep the night before. From this day forth, the goal is to maintain a level of consistency in healing through the remaining 78 Day in Seattle. Today is Day 22, and will be our first day back in the SCCA (outpatient clinic). Today, they will take several tests to measure and establish Pia’s baseline vitals.

Before the visit to the clinic starts, we had the start Pia’s hydration through IV (2000 cc’s at 225cc’s per hour). At the clinic, the nurses, physician’s assistant and the attending doctor, go through in detail Pia’s records of her recent stay at the Hospital. Vitals are taken, and we reconfirm all the medicines, which Pia will be on for the remainder of this journey in Seattle (these medicines can go on, anywhere from the next 78 days, to the next two years), to ensure Pia is treated for all viruses and potential fungus and organ damage (due to the heavy chemotherapy fro the transplant).

The prescription routine goes like this: Tacrollimus (FK-506) - prevents Graft vs., Host disease. Dapsone - prevents pneumocysitis pneumonia, Acyclovir – prevents herpes virus infections, Vancomycin – treats C difficile, Isonazid – prevents Turburcholosis reactivation, Fluconazole – prevents fungal infection, Pantoprazole – protects the stomach, and relieves heartburn and reflux, Citalopram – helps depression and mood changes, Multivitamins – balance body electrolytes, Ursodiol – prevents liver toxicity, Norelgestromin/ethinly – controls menstrual bleeding, Pyriddoxine – prevents peripheral neuropathy, Saline with various electrolytes – maintain mineral balance of the body, Lorazepan – controls nausea and vomiting, and Diphenhydramine – control nausea and vomiting. This treatment regiment must be taken twice a day from today on. It only gets further difficult, as it is very hard to swallow so many pills, that we try to get as many of the above medicines in liquid form to make it easer and more palatable for Pia to swallow.

The visit to the clinic goes well, and we run home to get Pia back in bed to rest. Just as we get home, the diarrhea gets worse again and we spend the rest of the afternoon and evening again in the bathroom. The stomach cramps still worsen into the night, and now it was time to collect a stool; sample and bring it back to the SCCA lab (the doctors are trying to see what infections may of rise, while also trying to see if there is any Graft vs, Host present in Pia). I drop off the sample and get home, only to spend more time with Pia, as what has suddenly become our favorite room in the apartment, the BATHROOM.

So as this episode continues, Pia and I were reading over some more cards from well-wishers. In fact we also got some more care packages from our supporters and friends. Today Pia got these great pajamas from some of our friends. They a matching set of penguins, with the phrase “Chill-lin”, as that is al we can do for the next 78 Days. Thanks Andrew and Diane…you guys are GREAT, we are so luck to have your friendship.

Today, I also spoke to Baby Varun’s dad (you might remember, that little boy who also had a transplant 2 days after Pia’s), they said he is doing OK, and they are hoping and praying his White Blood and ANC counts go up (since he had a cord blood transplant, the engrafting process usually takes longer than a stem cell transplant form marrow). Our prayers are with you Deepak…

Can’t also forget to mention, the poem we got from a little South Asian boy, who said he is only 10 years old (not old enough to be tested, but old enough to spread the “word” and educate everyone around him). He declared his handicap in age, but declared his strength in knowledge. Thank you young man, for being so strong to help your community…we are proud of our tenacity and courage to help us save lives in our community.


~Posted on 12/15/2004~
The whole morning is full of excitement, as Pia is being DISCHARGED TODAY!!! Yes it’s true, she’s actually coming back to the apartment today. Her ANC is very consistently high, as is all her other vital signs…the DONOR graft is Taking. As I prepare the apartment for Pia to come home too, Pia is at the hospital preparing to come home. In fact, with today not only comes the surprise of discharge, but also an unexpected visit from the members of the Seattle Seahawks Football Team. Not to forget, there were also some of the Lady Seahawks as well, to wish Pia a happy and healthy recovery at home.

As we prepare to leave the hospital today (DAY 21), Pia couldn’t help but to vomit all that was in her stomach from the morning and afternoon meals. It was amazing to see Pia’s determination of feeling better, so she could go home. Several of the wonderful nurses on the 8th. were so happy to send us off (I could actually see the happiness in several of the nurses’ faces, as we were now graduating back to discharged life). These nurses commend so much respect from us, as they are the pivotal part of Pia’s recovery process. A special BIG THANK YOU, goes to all the nurses who work so many countless days and nights, to ensure patient shouldn’t worry about anything.

After we get home, and Pia is reintroduced to Alli (our kitty), Pia runs for the bathroom, as the vomiting starts again. With patience Pia’s dad and I wait until her vomiting calms, and then I start the portable IV pump on Pia (since leaving the hospital, Pia’s goal is kept hydrated with 2000cc’s of electrolytes into her system, until her urge of eating and drinking increases. Not before long, Pia’s stomach starts cramping heavily, as diarrhea starts to precipitate. Pia spends the next two hours in the bathroom dealing with the pains (I too sit on the floor next to Pia as she vomits and continues to have diarrhea. You suddenly realize that your life will be spent in the bathroom (providing Pia the support and comfort she needs), for the next few days, until Pia’s system is functionally performing better.

The night nears, and I prepare the 8-10 various drugs that Pia has to take for the next several months, and years to prevent infection, rejection of the DONOR’S stem cells. By now, it’s getting even tougher for Pia to fall asleep, as the stomach pains are persisting to greater level of pain.

~Posted on 12/14/2004~
The day starts with the strong gusts of wet chilling rain. Some might say it’s just another Seattle gloomy winter day, I’m just glad it’s another day we can look forward to. One understands that another rainy day can never take away the pure pleasure of another day of LIFE. Today is DAY 20, Pia was supposed to get DISCHARGED, but unfortunately she is unable to hold down food in her system, and is constantly vomiting. So for now, Pia’s disappointment starts, as she is delayed from coming home.

As the afternoon continues, so does Pia’s fatigue. She falls asleep on my lap (in reverse direction, with her head facing the footboard of the bed), waiting for tomorrow to come by. I feel the sense of disappointment in her discharge delay, but I think we are used to the notion of being flexible (in the last two years of dealing with so many stays in the hospital, an extra day or two is not really not to bad, compared to the overall treatment of this disease.

Late into the evening as I continued to watch Pia sleep, I caught up to my emails from the day. Amazing how each day starts to early, and ends so quick (it’s like time is moving so fast, and you could do nothing to slow it down). I got a great email from a good associate and great friend of mine Bomsi, who in his own way was just checking up on Pia and me to make sure we were doing O.K. He kind of, in his style indicated the importance of what I was doing with Pia 3,000 miles away from home, and how it is the best thing someone can do ever, for someone he is in love with (I was flattered, as he and his wife Brenda are true example of a successful marriage and still in love today as the day they met). Thanks Bomsi and Brenda and for your support and vote of confidence in everything we are doing.

And lastly, A big THANK YOU to our donor…It is not often that Pia or I forget about you, and how your selfless act of courage is giving Pia a new life. We pray for you and your family’s safe being everyday. THANK YOU…THANK YOU.

~Posted on 12/13/2004~
Somehow, one can see the slower pace of a Sunday. Even here in Seattle, you see the hospital is right next to the University of Washington Football Stadium, and all week you can see the hustle and bustle of the 57,000 students and faculty members squiring about the campus (it feels just like being back in New York City). But things change on a Sunday, the football season is over, and there’s no longer any traffic near the hospital and stadium anymore. The hospital lobby is sparsely empty (even after 11:00pm, you can see all the young med students, laying down on any available couch trying to catch-up on their zees for the day).

The morning sun, slowly flickers between the blinds. Yes, there is sunlight today (the sun is so scarce in the winter, that people stop whatever they are doing to see the rays of light, and enough absorb whatever warmth may be present), in the mist of this dead winter month. Pia wakes to Day 19, with the aching of her Mucocitus torn throat coughing for air.

Her ANC counts are still on the upraise, and it looks like she will be discharged Monday. So far her hunger, has revisited need and her sense for survival. Remarkably, she is starting to swallow more than just clear liquids (some boiled carrots, even potatoes). As the day goes on, so does her wantful appetite to eat. Late afternoon unfortunately thinks turn for additional discomfort. After taking her medicine, all of her food intake for the day is coming up, and it becomes to hold anything in her stomach. Partially, this is her body reacting, while she is getting used to eating, swallowing, and digesting food for the first time. Slowly, I can see the anxieties on Pia’s face, know that she will be discharged tomorrow (it was one of those looks that a child would have, knowing that Friday is tomorrow, and it’s your favorite school day of the week because the weekend is here, but with it, also comes the Spelling Bee test on Fridays…so you’re really confused how you really feel about Friday coming around).

To get Pia’s mind off her stomach, we started to open some of the wonderful letters, cards and gifts sent by well wishers (THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR GENEROUSITY). It’s an overwhelming feeling to have so many people rooting for your safe healing (well wishes from UK, India, Australia, China and even the United States). There was a very unique card we got from a lovely person in Atlanta (Shalini P., who actually attended our first drive there, and has followed Pia’s story since), which was very pleasing for the eyes, and very detailed with thought…Thank you Shalini for not just getting test to be a potential donor, but for being with us all the way. It’s amazing to see the kindness of a complete stranger, who is no longer a stranger, but is part of the Matchpia.org family.

~Posted on 12/12/2004~
The day starts with complete speed, as my mom rushes to cook Pia some last minute soups and treats (a mother can never feel satisfied, unless they know they’ve done all they can), before she and my dad depart for the east coast. Also today, Pia’s dad arrives at his turn to support Pia’s treatment. Before long, one set of parents departs, and another parent arrives.

Today is Day 18, and Pia’s ANC is consistently up and moving closer and closer to engraftment. This treatment, is often a balancing act, as the numbers that measure her chemical improvement are getting better, but some of the physical pain that is not measured, seem to stay constant. Yes, the Mucocitis is still here and causes a lot of havoc in this journey. Her throat is still sore (as if a bolder is stuck in her esophagus), and making it hard to eat and swallow.

Pia is eating some of the various light soups, however, it’s very difficult to hold down the food for more than an hour or so. The throat not used to the food, just automatically sends it back up and out the mouth (as if the food is being rejected by the body). Amazing enough, after all the pain and bad taste that’s being experienced, Pia still continues to try to eat (being that all the counts are on their way up, and her chemical results are looking good, she needs to demonstrate that she can eat and swallow to be discharged from the hospital to go home).

Today, the TBN (Total body Nutrition), will be discontinued as Pia is able to eat on her own, and the doctors announced Pia would probably be DISCHARGED on Monday. What great news, this means that the donor cells are engrafting in a manner that the doctors are satisfied. Everyone around, is excited to know Pia is going back to the apartment to recuperate (this is Day 18, so if all goes well, we need to be here in Seattle until Day 100, which is another 88 Days until we go back home to the east coast).

As the day’s chilly rain turns to night, we receive a few visitors (local friends), to share the good news, of her coming home. Somehow every time someone comes to visit, I think the journey becomes more and more visible to everyone on how and why we are here in Seattle. I think people get to feel and see what it is that we go through each day of this journey, and take away the fact that life is precious, and things become better into perspective as what is more important, than not. One of our visitors mentioned that it has taught her, how to be less selfish with her own needs, and more aware of others who are in need. She was amazed that, even being in the hospital one day into the transplant, I spent the morning away from Pia, preparing and distributing food for the less fortunate, while Pia was alone at the hospital those few hours (you see, both Pia and I are grateful for what we have, and few hours apart, is a small sacrifice to know several less fortunate individuals will have something warm to eat on Thanksgiving).


~Posted on 12/11/2004~
As I looked out of the window, I noticed the misty wet waters of the Puget Sound. There, you can see the cargo ships full of large containers coming to port, every morning, afternoon and evening. It’s as if, no matter how bad the rainy and windy weather is pushed ashore by Mother Nature, the ships still come to port and leave port. It reminds me of how sometimes caregivers must do the same. No matter how turbulent our life’s become in dealing with this journey of transplant, we must all endure to “Stay the Course”. Consistency and commitment are becoming the words of the day.

With another day of great pain and swelling of the mouth, Pia still sees and feels the extreme pain from the Mucocitis. Consequently, her vomiting and nausea still remain. Her ANC, still continues to rise, as her engraftment from the donor stem cells are staring to graft. Today is Day 17, and Pia’s throat is still feeling the hardships of pain. Interesting enough, we are told by the doctors that Pia may be able to be discharged soon (as her counts are coming up strongly, and all her vitals are looking good). Only one catch, she has to be able to swallow and eat food like a normal individual (the TBN-Total body Nutrition via IV will have to stop, and she will be whined off the pain killers), and hold it down.

Thats a great sign, as now I have to attend “Pump Class” for caregivers. Upon discharge, Pia will be given 2000 cc’s of hydration via an IV pump (caregivers are required to attend a pump class to administer hydration an IV liquids). At the pump class, they go over the basic details of how to operate the portable battery powered pump. So for the next hour, I stay focused, and learn everything I can, on the use of an such instrument, that will keep Pia hydrated until she can consumer liquids on her own.

The night ends as my parents and I bid goodnight to Pia. Tonight, now becomes a special night for my parents, as they meet Rujuta and Vivek. My parents wanted to meet the special couple that has become a great source of support for us in Seattle. Rujuta, who did a donor drive for us when we first stared our campaign (she and her husband signed up 33 people in someone’s house…awesome!!!). Since then, we have become such good friends here in Seattle. With gratitude for them, my mother cooked a very authentic Indian dinner for our invited quests. The themes tonight, become rewarding, as the young newly married couple in Seattle, spent so much of their time helping Pia and I with anything we need. At dinner, I toasted the couple with a speech. You see, this couple is another example of how “complete strangers, have come together in saving lives in our South Asian Community”. Thank you Rujuta and Vivek, for making our stay in Seattle brighter.

~Posted on 12/10/2004~
Today, with the support of my parents, we watched and prayed that the day would lead Pia into better spirits. Her ANC is still increasing steadily, and so is her other counts. However, so far it’s been so hard to eat, swallow and let alone speak. It is Day 16, and like any journey, we still continue to face the challenges of the travel ahead. Today, I realized that this journey not only affects the lives of Pia, myself, our families and our friends and supporters, but also a special someone close to us. Yes, our kitty cat Alli. Well let’s just say, she wanted all of us to know that her vote counted. Most days I can see her, scrimmaging around to smell any remnants of Pia’s existence (since she’s been in the hospital 22 days already). Today her search has ended, and she decides to inform me of her feelings.

By carefully sniffing all around the bed, she found the best spot that reminds her of Pia, and decides to leave a souvenir (I think, incase Pia was lost and was looking for her). Yes, she strategically and precisely urinated on the bed (a wonderful way of letting me know that mommy is missed).

Well, after I had a wonderful time changing the sheets and visiting the dry cleaners, it dawned upon me, that maybe I should find a cat sitter while I an away at the hospital…that thought didn’t last too long, as I could never become a latchkey parent. So today I learned, even though us humans have a difficult time dealing with cancer…so do our feline friends.

~Posted on 12/9/2004~
The morning breaks with another day of nothing but rain. Some people back in the east coast wonder why such a young couple would give up the comforts of home, and the normalcy of four different and distinct seasons a year, for a almost all year season of rain… Well yes, Seattle offers a lot of rain, but also offers some of the finest medical professionals Pia and I have ever dealt with on this journey (for the disease of leukemia and Transplants).

You see, the rain is so dreary and lonesome; one definitely can see why people drink so much coffee here. They have Starbucks, Tully’s, Seattle’s Best, Pete’s and all the various independent coffee shops in town. There must be over 50 Starbucks, 30 Seattle’s Best and 20 Tully’s just in the downtown area. A city of dreary weather, but that’s made up for, by having great coffee.

It’s Day 15, and Pia’s ANC is rising pretty quickly…actually “jumping up pretty quickly”. Her spirits are pretty good, as you can see that the Mucocitis is hopefully nearing the end. However, now instead of cold compresses on her neck, Pia now prefers hot compresses to dampen the pain. Slowly, her appetite is starting to come back (she is still on TBN – Total Body Nutrition via IV, since she is unable to swallow). Her first tastes of chicken broth seem to be foreign, as her throat is relearning what it is to swallow for the first time. Her stomach is definitely confused on what the food is. The anxiety in her body becomes so confused and nervous (you know, like when you were in your first grade school play, and you had to recite your solo lines in front of complete strangers for the first time).

Not holding down her food (throwing-up everything she eats), becomes the common theme of the day. Slowly and steadily, Pia teaches her body to readjust and retrain it’s self to digest food for the first time. Ironically enough, the teacher who teaches students now teaches her own self to eat.

Interestingly, Pia’s mom, and my mom and dad are here this week, lending a hand in the trenches. What credit, I give to these ladies, who are not just every ounce of the word “Mother”, but our support and strength during our time of need. Pia’s mom, what a lady, full of strength and courage, fighting with us through this time. She definitely displayed such a sheer virtue to embrace this situation, and make the best of it. Thank you for staying so many of those late nighters at the hospital room, and making all those lovely broths and soups for Pia. Your commitment and sheer love will always be in our hearts’, and never be forgotten.

To my mother and father, though it is not everyday you see your son, he is here everyday thinking about you. And more specific all the courage and devotion you provide in standing by me since the beginning of this journey. You see in our South Asian culture, it so easy for a boy’s parents to tell their son “Let’s move on, this situation may not be good for your future”. That’s what most typical South Asian parents would say, when their son’s girlfriend (not even fiancée at the time), gets diagnosed with cancer. Luck may have it, my parents were supportive since the day we found out about the Leukemia (I gotta be honest, and say they must have been scared, but never unsupportive, always believing in me and Pia).

I can’t believe, between both mothers, the amount of time that was spent making so much food for Pia and I. It was almost like have two gourmet chefs at our disposal for a week. It was also great to see my dad, putting in his few word of encouragement (you see, my dad fell in love with Pia since the day they met. In our culture teachers are very respected, for their noble cause to teach life’s lessons to our community), to Pia (every time he sees her, he has article on teaching, until just recent, they been all about dealing with, beating and surviving cancer).

These last few days, have taught me, so much about the importance of parenthood and life. I always thought the world of mine, and Pia’s parents, and now, I can see how both Pia and I do certain things for the good of society and mankind. It’s because we were fortunate to have good parents guiding us along the way, always accepting our faults, and teaching us from our mistakes…A Big Thank You to our Loving Parents.

~Posted on 12/8/2004~
The ANC number has remained above 500, for the last three days, hence, this may be an indication that the graft is possibly taking. It is DAY 14, and Pia is still in a lot of pain from sores in her mouth. Her head feels “heavy”, as if it is congested. It’s been three weeks since she’s been admitted into the hospital, and different from the last hospital stays, this one will determine if she can come home alive.

As the weather here in Seattle, can change at a drop of a “dime”, so does Pia’s health condition. I’ve noticed that at this stage of the treatment, a patient’s senses become very attuned in some ways, like taste, smell and sometimes the ability to process sounds. The slightest change in pitch and sound, light and dark may not make a difference for you and me, but for a patient, it can make a difference between pleasant symphony, vs. being at racetrack. It’s best to keep everything in a patient’s room constant, and avoid many changes in light and tone…just my thoughts from experiences.

I think the last twenty weeks of not sleeping, has finally caught up to me the last few days. The weather here has been getting worse (cold…that chilly…bone wet….feel), and definitely not adding to sense of my wellbeing. It makes me even more cautious to avoid getting a cold. It’s like that movie with Bill Murray (Ground Hog Day), where he does the same thing everyday, over and over… That’s definitely what the trips to the hospital feel life, and those darn elevators take forever to get you upstairs. But what breaks the whole monotony and change of scenery, is the notion of seeing Pia’s eyes light up (as when a child sees a parent after being away for a long time), when I walk in the room (even though she is often sound asleep, from the heavy pain killers).

Today, I got a call from an elderly woman we met at the Medical Center when we first got here to prepare for Pia’s treatment. A very pretty elderly woman (the kind that you know, came from a polished family, and gives the aura of Audrey Hepburn). Her name is Lynn, but I always referred to her as Mom. We met one day as I was waiting to get a flu shoot (all caregivers must be vaccinated). She and her son were sitting next to me waiting, while we started a conversation. She and her son were so friendly, in welcoming us to Seattle. With every word that came out of her mouth, Lynn spoke with such eloquence, and a sense of sophistication. She was originally from New Zealand you see.

Well every Wednesday, we would bump into Lynn, as she would come in to get her chemo treatment. One Wednesday, we couldn’t find Lynn in the usually place, we started to get worried. And later we ran into her, as Pia got her last dose of chemo in the space right next to her (the same day Pia was being admitted into the hospital). We exchanged our phone numbers and addresses.

Since then, we never heard from Lynn. Often in the last few weeks on Wednesdays, both Pia and I would wonder if Lynn was doing O.K. But never really said anything, because you see, when you are in a cancer hospital, no news can be sometimes good news, or sometimes mean the end.

Well what a surprise today, Lynn was safe and sound. She called, because she was worried for Pia, and thought Pia might have already gone home, without ever saying goodbye or sharing a cup of tea with her. She was so horrified, that she would never see Pia again.

I told Lynn, Pia is recovering, and is in a lot of discomfort these days (trying not to worry her). It’s as if I could see Lynn smile from the other side of the telephone, as she said, “Don’t worry God is watching her”. How do you react, to a complete stranger, telling you everything will be alright?

Some say, that these are signs fare from above, some say its destiny, others say it’s Karma. I don’t know which to believe, but I will say that Pia has touch so many of us during this journey, that we can not stop to think what our lives would have been like, if we haven’t met her.

My take away for today, Life is a precious gift that connects the things we care about, and the things we don’t even know about. But somehow one life can affect so many others, and in turn those lives affecting so many others. The irony for me, is how, I can get a better picture of how we are all human beings connected in the way we serve humanity.


~Posted on 12/7/2004~
Another day of wet chilling rain that hits the roads of Seattle (the traffic just slows in all directions). I wondered if I would make it to the hospital in enough time, to see Pia awake. This is Day 13, and Pia’s ANC count is still around 750 (two days in a row, that the counts are above 500…a good sign). The mucocitis, has continued to rule the day, and her mouth has gotten even sorer.

I knew Pia wasn’t feeling well, but her smile just shined when I saw her. What allows a human to endure so much pain, but yet, continue to have a smile throughout. The winter decorations at the hospital start to span from hallway to hallway. You can not help but notice that Christmas is coming, and Hanukah has started. Just brought back memories of last year’s Christmas back home, with the fireplace going, and Alli sniffing at the Christmas tree like as if she was exploring the Amazon (she’s an indoor cat, and tries to sneak out to sniff, some of the trees outside, when front door opens).

Today, I got email from an individual who lost their son to Leukemia a few years ago. This individual thanked us for bringing the government, media and the community together to understand the importance of getting tested, and becoming a potential donor to save a patient in need in the South Asian Community. She mentioned her son didn’t make it, and spent his last few months doing donor drives to find a match. She commended us for bringing so much attention to the cause, and for a second, wished we were around a few years ago when they needed a match.

She said “It would have been great if we had a network of support for patients like you guys have been doing, my son world of loved it”. I have to say, I am touched by all your complements, and I wish I knew about the importance of this cause a few years ago too. She responded by saying that there is a check in the mail to the South Asian Marrow Foundation, to help keep the cause going in the memory her son. I am touched, thank you for believing in our efforts…


~Posted on 12/6/2004~
The ANC number has gone up to 750 (if the counts remain above 500 for two more consecutive days, then the doctors can preliminary deduce that the Graft (stem cells from the donor is being accepted by Pia’s body), is taking. Today, is DAY 12 and the mucocitis, is getting better, as the mucus is starting to decrease in the frequency and flow in Pia’s mouth (so far, through the vacuum suction, the container has filled to the top twice, that’s like the size of 3 to 4 quarts of liquid mucocitis from the Pia’s lining of her throat).

Also, I finally heard some words from Pia’s mouth today. Yes, the pain has slightly diminished enough to speak for a few moments (the pain is a little less in her throat, but more in her mouth now). Still under heavy pain killers, Pia dazes in and out. For a moment this afternoon, I also felt so tired (20 weeks of no sleep is staring to fade in), that I crashed for a bit too. For a matter of 2 hours, both Pia and I were sound asleep. I think these were the only two hours we both were insulated together from the whole world, since she got admitted into the hospital.

The night came very quickly, as we got several emails from well wishers (thank you, for your good wishes, they are always welcomed on rainy days). So many well wishers mentioned that they were so proud of Pia’s courage and strength to face this head on, and also proceeding to continue to help other South Asian patients along the way. Two individuals had convinced all their colleagues to donate to the South Asian Marrow Foundation, while they also had their employers match the contributions.

And then there was a unique message from a South Asian TV network individual, who just was so thankful in being apart of our journey with Pia (while also being sorry for not originally believing in help publicizing the cause). I remember handing a flyer to this person (the flyer had Pia’s appeal, and the importance of saving her Life), and him looking at it with no interest, while the other media folks were all interested in the story.

You see, I met this person at the Kerry/Edwards South Asian Breakfast this past summer (as Matchpia.org, was the only humanitarian cause that was able to pass out flyers at the event). It was a week into our journey since Pia relapsed, and I had to get the word out to everyone ASAP.

Then a week later, this individual called me to do an interview, which lead to another interview, which lead to any access I needed for the South Asian Media. It’s strange, because in the end, this individual and I became the greatest of friends. Now, I invite him to exclusive interviews, such as the Consulate General of India, getting tested in the New York, doing a TV appearance on getting tested and spreading the word. In the end, what’s even more ironic, is this person knew Pia’s parents and grandparents very well 10 years ago. It’s funny, how life has its ways of reconnecting people from the past. Thank you, for all that you have done to continue this cause for us.

Lastly, we wanted our donor to know, that we have not forgotten you, and your extreme courage. We prey for you everyday, and hope your strength and courage shines on all those who also have the opportunity to donate stem cell/bone marrow to other patients in need.

~Posted on 12/5/2004~
The morning of Day 11, starts with rain tapping at the windows of the hospital room. The pain and soreness of Pia’s throat still continues, as Pia keeps waking every 10 to 15 minutes using the suction tube to extract the runny mucus from her moth (the suction tube in connect to a vacuum-like container that collect all the mucus from Pia’s throat, rather than her coughing up the excess mucus).

By now, we think the pain of this part of the journey is at its highest. Hence, Pia is very busy visualizing the downhill journey from here. Her new “hair do”, is looking pretty cool, as she definitely gives Shanate O’Conner a run for her money. Now the mental challenge comes into the mind of every patient. You see, now starts the numbers and infection game. There’s always a target number which determines if the journey is worth taking, and in this case, it’s the right Absolute Neutrifil Count (ANC). This is the number that let’s the doctors know that the “Graft” (stem cells from the donor), have correctly started to find their way home into Pia’s marrow. We need to ensure that we eventually achieve an optimal ANC count of 4,000 to 12,000. As a start, the ANC, count has to be 500 or greater 3 days in a row to declare that the Graft is working, and so far we are under 500.

And the infection part is also a crucial component to recovery and survival, Until Pia at least reaches 4000 ANC mark, her ability to attract infection is high, as her immunity is very low, or lack of immunity. So the challenge remains on her to always wash her hands, stay away from crowds of people (especially anyone who is sick), and make sure foods are handled in a safe manner during, and up until they are consumed by her.

So we continue to conduct deep discussions with Pia’s stem cells, to provide them the encouragement to “Graft” appropriately in Pia’s marrow. As we give some encouragement to Pia’s stem cells, I and Pia would also like to give some encouragement to all those Patients still awaiting a match. We have not forgotten you guys, as we continue to work with most of you everyday on various levels of your search and transplant. We need you to also help us spread the word, on the importance of being tested, and becoming an educated and committed donors in the NMDP Registry. Tell your friends “It Only Takes One Match to Save a Life”. And maybe they can be that one match.


~Posted on 12/4/2004~
The pain still continues, and the today (Day 10), the metamorphosis takes place. The hair loss gets too messy, that Pia requests me to shave off all her remaining hair. This being the third time she’s lost her hair, I’ve gotten a hang of using the hair sheers by now.

As all the hairs fall off her head, so starts the healing of all the harsh sadness of the day we were told that the cancer found its way back into our lives. So now, our broken wings start to heal, as we continue to travel this journey to recovery. And at what better time, then as the Christmas season arrives.

Today, the decorations at the hospital start to appear (I guess this year’s theme is the “Polar Express”), on all the patient doors (a phrase of the story, sequential on each door). Another year is nearing end, and again, we will live endure all that life brings us.

Yesterday, I was told a very touching story about a little girl, who decided to make Pia the discussion in her “Show and tell Class” (she took to class various newspaper clippings on Pia’s story). It turned into a theme of determination, and not giving up for anything…especially when it comes to Life. This almost eight year old girl, spoke about how everyone came together to not accept “No” or “Impossible” for an answer.

You see, we were told we would never find a match for Pia, as there are so few South Asians represented in the National Marrow Donor Program (NMDP). Her teacher told her to bring the stories to the school nurse, and she did. The nurse read the stories, and felt so sad and sympathized with the little girl. She said “I’m so sorry to her about Pia”. The little girl young in age, but old in sprit and heart proclaimed “Why are you sorry, she and Tim found a match, and they had the transplant and will be healthier than ever”. She further claimed “They did it! we did it! I spent my whole summer at donor drives with them…”

Soon the story got around at school that determination and teamwork can accomplish all challenges that life brings us. Pia and I are very proud of this little girl, who exemplified the resilience of children in their thirst for learning, and making a difference to our community (and how people are being empowered by the Matchpia.org campaign). This child is very near and dear to us, as it is our niece Jazmin. We are PROUD of all you do for the cause everyday, and LOVE you dearly.

~Posted on 12/3/2004~
The day starts with extricating pain, as the Mucocitis has still taken over Pia’s body, and continues to cause tremendous pain. Today is Day 9, and slowly, I noticed some of her hairs falling out the last few days, but today it’s coming out in clumps. It’s almost time to see the major physical metamorphosis. You see, so far the chemotherapies are shedding the mucus linings in the body, but now the meta•mor•pho•sis (me-t&-'mor-f&-s&s a striking alteration in appearance, character, or circumstances), of her physical being, has begun.

She will soon look like a real “Cancer Patient”, being treated for the disease, one without hair. Now is when, the only sense of identity to the public eye, is her sense of dignity (her ideas on what her position in life will prevail, and her thirst for wanting to live, will over power her physical appearance). So we carry on to another day of Hope and Strength, as “The Sun Also Rises”.


~Posted on 12/2/2004~
It didn’t rain today (and who says, it only rains in Seattle). Well today is DAY 8, and the Mucocitis has participated extremely fast (this was expected, not to worry). Pia’s pain in her throat is still present, in fact, the pains feel even sharper as she swallows water…she said “it feels life walking on sharp glass, every time I swallow”. What courage she and the other patients must manifest to continue in “Staying the Course” to survive.

As the night gets late, I watched Pia fade in and out of sleep, often mumbling something… I feel helpless, and just want to take some of the pain away. Unfortunately, she’s driving “Solo” for the next several days, as her body sheds her mucus lining inside out. For a few minutes I put my hand on her swollen cheek (of course with a glove on my hand, to prevent any infection), to comfort her. She grabbed my wrist with two hands, as if she was balancing herself on a subway pole, and the train suddenly left the platform. It felt so powerful to feel her hands clutch my wrist. I watched her closed eye face, as she finally felt comfortable, and listened to her breath fade in and out, as she became comfortable, and went into deep sleep.

For a moment like this, it humbles me to realize the freedom I have, as an individual with a normal healthy immune system. The night continued, as I watched Pia fade in and out, trying to keep her eyes open (as the pain killers try to sedate her into deep sleep). I felt even sadder to know, that I can leave this hospital room tonight, and do anything that my freedom of a healthy immune system allows. While for these patients, they take nothing for grant it. What can I say PIA, you are my Champ, my foundation of hope and my everyday strength. Thank you for letting me, become a part of your life, and further for, showing me what true love, commitment and devotion is all about.

While I am in the thanking mode, there are three very important individuals who need not only to be thanked, but celebrated for fighting this disease with us, for the last 2.5 years. That’s my brothers Aron and Ani, and my sister Sangeeta. You guys have been so supportive to Pia and I, that I don’t think I can ever stop thanking you guys. There are times where I had to hunker down with Pia for few days, and always my Wing Man Aron took the reigns in keeping the momentum (motivating and guiding all his contacts globally to join the campaign), flowing in the right direction…and mobilizing and rolling out our “Drive in a box kits”, throughout the US. Ani, you made the Virginia’s, Maryland and DC happen for us, and always kept the torch lit, guiding our community through this education process. And to my sister Sangeeta, a shelter for all the heaven’s angels…Thank you for always looking out for Pia and I.

These are among many dedicated folks who gave up every Friday, Saturday and Sundays (can’t forget some of the days in the week for planning too), for the last 20 weeks. You guys gave up your Birthdays, Anniversaries, Picnics, Vacations and Kiddie Parties to help us do donor drives. You guys are the quintessential example of “We Are Family”.


~Posted on 12/1/2004~
Today marked one week from the date Pia had the transplant. It is Day 7, and the journey goes on. Pia’s Mucocitus is still here in a big way, in fact it is getting even more difficult for Pia to swallow of even talk. She is constantly feed pain killer medications through IV all day and night. What a trooper, still focused on seeing the pain through, as it will take another 6-7 days, for the Mucocitis to go away. She was so quite and rested all day, or at least until I showed up with some new gifts in hand (bought her several kitty cat books, puzzles and activities, to make the time pass).

Also, today we celebrated our one year “Engagement Anniversary”. I know, it’s becoming a habit to have these celebrations in the hospitals, instead of where we want to. First, our Engagement Day party (celebrated at Memorial Sloan Kettering), and now our one year Engagement Anniversary at (Fred Hutch Cancer Center at UW Hospital). Life can only get better from here… Pia got several cards and well wishes sent to the hospital today. Thank you all for sending your lovely thoughts via email and postal, they really help to brighten the day.

There is a funny story I’d like to share with you. As I went to grab a bite to eat at the cafeteria, I noticed a South Asian fellow walking by, and smiling at me, like he wanted to say hi. I thought to myself, well that‘s no different than usual, I must of met over 60,000 South Asians in the last 20 weeks. I looked down at my plate, as I was eating my sandwich (only a few seconds), I herd a voice that said “Would you mind, if I joined you”. I looked up, and it was that South Asian fellow I saw before. Slightly tired, I smiled and said yes, as I introduced myself. The fellow said, that he was here from the East Coast (New Heaven, Connecticut), meeting his cousin here (she was running late), and that he went to school at Yale University.

I just sat and listened, until he asked me what was doing here. I mentioned, I was here with my fiancé to have a stem-cell transplant. Instantly, he said “You mean Miss Pia?”. I said, “Yea”. He smiled, and said I went to get tested at the Yale donor drive for Pia. In shock, we both realized that we were over 3,000 miles away from our home, and yet met randomly in Seattle, where the transplant was taking place. What a notion, that supports the cliché, “It’s a small world after all”. And moreover, it was so amazing, to see how he (I never got his name), was so honored to be apart of our cause to bring awareness to the South Asian Community.

It’s great to know, that the word has traveled all around the United States and around the world, on how a “Grass Roots” effort becomes mainstream in everyone’s hearts. To our friend from Yale, thank you for going to our donor drive, and being part of our campaign.

And remember, please continue to spread the word, as on we can make a difference in saving life’s in our community. And to Pia’s donor, a week has gone by, and will still think of you everyday…Thank you for giving us a second chance at Life, when they told us that we would never find you. We beat the odds, thanks to you!!!


~Posted on 11/30/2004~
It’s Day 6 after the transplant, and we are grateful for another day of Life! Pia has been so focused in healing, that her pain is a secondary factor of life. The Mucocitus (a white film in her throat, caused by all chemotherapy she took right before the transplant), is starting to wear her down. It’s feels like having lumps in your throat, and causes a lot of soarness and pain. It gets very difficult to eat after a while, and it even hurts to speak. This is usually when you are feed, all your daily supply of nutrients via an IV solution. Hopefully, this will only last a week, as I can see the discomfort on Pia’s face minute by minute.

As I watched Pia daze in and out this evening, I only wondered how the pain felt. I guess it was scary to see someone you Love soo much, look so empty in pain. Kinda, made me sad and helpless. Just before she went to sleep, I put a few smiles on her face, as I show her the several pairs of pajama’s I bought her (she wanted some new ones, to brighten her experience in the hospital), in all the various bright colors…I was even able to find one with different kitty cats all over.

So the night went on, as I just watched her fade in and out of short ranged naps. While I sat next to her, I was reading my emails for the day, and came a cross a few interesting questions from concerned parties. One particular gentleman asked me, why I gave up my career, life and wages, to do this. Well, my answer is, I felt I had to. And I did, 12 weeks ago… No regrets for me, as I was able to find Pia, and now other patients will also get matches from our work. You see, sometimes in life we have to take chances, not knowing what the outcome will be. In this case, I along with Pia, know the odds were against us, but collectively decided for me to leave work to focus on this cause. You see, our odds were really greater than 1 in 1,000,000 chance to find an identical match…it’s actually 1 in several millions (probably easier to win the lottery). But we found it, and got to transplant, and now have to survive the road ahead, “The Road less Traveled”.

I suppose my future, only has room for Pia and all the other patients I speak to everyday. I’m not sure where I will work, or who will hire me one day, for that’s all auxiliary when it comes to life and death.

A woman told me, that after following Pia’s story for the last 5 months, that she and her husband were so grateful for each other, and learned so much from us on what devotion and commitment meant in a relationship…they are no longer getting divorced. She and her husband see a “new leaf” on life, and thanked us for reminding them why they got married in the first place. My message to this woman “Stay the Course”, and focus on why you two should be together, and start to heal the reasons you think are keeping you apart”.

In the end, life has given me a new perspective that allows me the strength, to know that there is hope for another day, and that hope will guide us to want to life. For all our patients waiting for a match, believe in yourselves to be strong and have hope for another day.


~Posted on 11/29/2004~
The transplant occurred on 2:55pm on Wednesday, and last a few hours. The effects of the infusion were quite harsh at first (a lot of shivering and HIGH Fevers), but subsided by 9:30 – 10:00pm. I was so proud of Pia, she laid there in complete helplessness from the infusion. The nurses were great, in helping us with giving Pia warm blankets and a lot of care. It was a very stressful situation, as Pia and opted to go through this alone on the days of transplant (we asked our families to come after we knew it was OK , and we felt the situation was less stressful). So the day ended with the notion of US HAVING A NEW BABY GIRL.. She weighted in at 345cc (weight of the stem cells).

The next day (Thursday), it was like feeding a new born at feeding time. Wow, I felt like a new caretaker with new responsibilities. The day had a lot up ups and downs, as her energy levels fluctuated with her mood. It was very important to know just be there at beckon call for what ever Pia needed. So many emails came in that day, THANK YOU all for your support. Amazing enough, I had emails from several board members (thank you…Mutzi, Edgar and Melenie…you guys are true Leaders), and donor centers from the National Marrow Donor Program (New England, LA, Carolinas and HLR Registry NJ). Two of our great friends from the east coast, and STARS from the Broadway hit Bombay Dreams, couldn’t resist but had to call us. Thank you Manu and Crystal… for all you do for our campaign everyday.

Amazing enough, Thursday not only represented Day 1 of Pia’s new life, but it was Thanksgiving. Last Thanksgiving I proposed to Pia on the top of the Eiffel Tower, and this Thanksgiving, I am giving thanks for her having a second chance at LIFE. Typically, Thanksgiving and Christmas we usually make sandwiches and coffee, and hand them out to the less fortunate on the streets. Well this Thanksgiving, the tradition went on, instead of the streets of New York City, it was the streets of downtown Seattle. And only this year, I went solo, with Pia in my thoughts.

My god, we are so GREATFUL, for that we have, instead of what we don’t have. To all you out there, whether you got tested at one of our drives, you volunteered, you told a family member or friend about the importance of getting tested, or even generously contributed to the South Asian Marrow Foundation Fund, I and Pia, TRULY thank you for all your support.

To our donor, whoever you are, where ever you are in the UK, thank you for giving us a second chance at Life. To The Anthony Nolan Trust Registry in UK, thank you for enabling this to happen…we look forward to working with you guys going forward.

Lastly, most importantly, please continue to “spread the word”, on the importance of becoming an educated and committed donor in the NMDP Registry. There are several South Asian patients how are waiting for a match, and only we as a community, can make a change to save LIFES.

~Posted on 11/23/2004~
The transplant didn’t happen today, the cells were not processed onetime to have the infusions start. When you look at the big picture, another day of waiting is painful, but at least we have cells to enable a transplant. Pia, was such a good sport about the delay. Although she had a reaction to the suppressant drugs, that lead her breaking out in rashes all over her body, and suffering stomach pains all day, she was a champ in my eyes.

November 24, now becomes the new date of transplant. So, please keep us all in your prayers tomorrow. And again, I thank our donor, for having the courage to make a difference in saving Pia’s life. We hope, your courage will serve as an example of how donors in our community should be commited to donate stem cells to save alife.

~Posted on 11/22/2004~
So it’s T-1, and the Transplant is tomorrow. So far all is on schedule. Yesterday, Pia had a terrible fever as a result of one of the reactions to one of the medicines she need to take. It was really scary to see her so sick again, her eyes turned so red, and her fever was just not quitting. Thankfully late, late into the night it came down severely.

Today, her temperature is back to normal, and she is resting all day. She still has her appetite and strength. Man, what a trooper she has become. So as I sit next to her, while she is peacefully resting, I realize the true person she really is in tackling this disease head on, and all the other patients who manage to make it to another day of hope. It really put things into further perspective for all of us caregivers and loved ones.

This past weekend was very busy, as both Anoli and I had to be in LA to shoot the last actors in our series of Public Service Announcements (PSA’s). It was so awesome to have our friends in Seattle (Rujuta and Vivek), to help us out, in being with Pia, while I was gone. Also, Pia’s cousin Rama, for hanging out all weekend, until I got back. Thanks guys for all your support this weekend.

Our PSA shoot in LA, went great. We had two great actors who joined our cause to spread more awareness of the importance of getting tested, and becoming an educated and committed donor. We had Ravi Kapoor from NBC’s Crossing Jordan and Pariminder Nagra form NBC’s ER (also the star from Bend it Like Becham). These are some of the finest South Asian actors I have seen, who “steped up”, and devoting their time, energy and celebrity status to our cause. Thank you guys, for such the great job you guys did this past weekend. We are proud of your commitment to your fans in the South Asian Community.

On a different note, I would like to thank our donor in giving Pia the hope and chance at another chance at Life. Your kindness will never be forgotten. We pray for you everyday, and hope your courage and commitment in being a donor will allow others to be inspired and commit in saving a Life.

Lastly, as you all lay down to rest this evening, please say a prayer for Pia and all the other patients who need our help to find a donor.

~Posted on 11/19/2004~
Its five days before the transplant (T-5), and things are so far are O.K. Pia has been reacting quite well to the Fludarabine. It escapes me, to see her so inspired to carry on with life as if this visit to the hospital was just another visit. Her yoga instructor, Jennifer came around yesterday for a session. She is so nice, you can tell that she so enjoys the warmth in spiritually and physically healing Pia during this Journey. Thanks Jennifer…

Yesterday, one of our very close friends (Anoli), from the east coast, came to see us. She is the great director the shot the 10 minute DVD of Pia’s journey. Not only is she a friend, but a true sister who believes in the cause, and is living it with us everyday. Anoli, and I have been working on the new Public Service Announcements that will be coming out on this cause very soon. Thanks for coming Anoli…

So the days are passing very quickly, and the transplant is almost here. So many feelings, just go through your head, we were told we were never going to get this far, how did we make it this far? Why do so many people care about us, when some don’t even know us? Are we doing everything in our power to make it through the transplant? What will life be like after next Tuesday? The questions are endless, but the reality is, we are focused and with the support of our family, friends and community, we will make next Tuesday a success.

That leaves one last thought for now, PLEASE do not forget all the other patients waiting for a match. Please continue to fight even harder to spread the message out to the community, on the importance of getting tested..and the importance of being a COMMITED donor who is willing to save a LIFE.

~Posted on 11/17/2004~
The first dose of Fludarabine Chemo ended today, and the next phase, Busulphane, will completely wipe out Pia’s immune system (even though it's only given once a day for four days). Pia got admitted into the hospital today for the next round of Chemo. It was hard watching her tears come out as she was say good bye to Alli (our cat), it was like her own child was going away to boarding school in a foreign far away country. For now she looks at the water view of the Pugent Sound from our living room, and holds onto the memory until she gets back from the hospital (hopefully before Christmas).

So once again, it’s Alli and I (and who said a man’s best friend is a dog…), until mommy feels good enough to find her way home.

~Posted on 11/15/2004~
The weekend was so busy getting ready for the transplant. Pia started her chemo yesterday, and did a great job. The process took less than an hour. Those nurses were great. Moreover, Pia handled it so good…her positive attitude made it easier for everyone to bear.

I ran into a South Asian taxi cab driver that drove me to the hospital (Pia and I drove separately that morning), he saw our “famous” Matchpia.org (the one that says “It Only Takes One Match to Save a Life”), on my jacket, and asked how Pia was doing. I was surprised that he heard of us, apparently his cousin in Atlanta, got tested at one of our drives (what a small world). He told me he was happy that we were trying to save life’s in the South Asian Community. He then asked me where he could get tested in Seattle. As we arrived at the hospital, and I was getting out of the cab, he looked back at me, and said “Dutta, thank you for saving life’s”, and said my money was no good to him, and speed off. I was speechless and at aw. What a nice guy. Mr. Taxi driver, whoever you are thank you…I am honored at your gesture.

The drives this weekend went great, as we are in a desperate search for all the South Asian patients. This weekend, we had some great turnouts for our South Asian patients, one patient particularly, was Anupama (who is a 29 year old mother of a 3 and a half year old son, was diagnosed with ALL. She had been in remission for two years but, unfortunately, she has relapsed this year). We had several drives for her, with a lot of family and friends attending, in the hopes of helping to save her life. Thank You all so much, for being supportive to Anupama and her family.

Also, a very exciting story that happened was with our coordinators, and one of Pia’s best friends in Florida (Latha), that turned into some great news for Matchpia.org. Latha has been on our campaign since the beginning, and was responsible for helping us recruit more 600 donors in Florida these last few months. She took this campaign one step further this weekend, through her strong tides with the community and the AIA South Florida chapter, she was able to work President Lakshmi Subrahmaniane to raise an additional $1,000 for our campaign, to continue to get South Asian and minorities registered in the NMDP Registry. Thank you greatly Lakshmi Subrahmaniane and the AIA South Florida Chapter, for not only allowing us to set-up donor drives at your events, but contributing funds (your wonderful donation), to bring further awareness of this crisis in our community.

~Posted on 11/12/2004~
What a day, surgery in the morning, and working with the media in the afternoon. Today, Pia got her Hickman line put in (this tube will be used to send fluids into her body, before, during and after her transplant) It also allows the medical team to also draw blood samples without poking her arms. It was a pure awesome sight to watch Dr. Hickman do the procedure himself (as I was allowed to scrub in for the session).
It was also scary to see Pia sedated, during the procedure…I really started to feel, that the transplant is nearing, and the sheer strength she will need to posses to make it through the journey. What courage all these transplant patients must have within themselves, to survive and have the desire to live…it just makes me think what I would do if I was in her shoes.
I was asked yesterday by a woman in New York if a $100 donation was good enough to make an impact to the cause. She said her company will match it as well. I told her, whether it was $1, $10, $100, or $1000 dollars, it is more that we had before she made her contribution. Really, we need more contributions to keep this cause going in the fashion we need to, in order to do more donor drives, and find more matches. But remember, contribute what you can afford to, and let your companies match the contribution, in addition; tell all your friends and colleagues to do the same.
We are here, because we started this “Grass Root”, campaign with family, friends, colleagues and complete strangers wanting to help. And we ask all those same family, friends, colleagues and complete strangers to keep the message alive by sharing our cause with everyone you know. That is the only way we can ensure that every awaiting patient can get a match and go into transplant.


~Posted on 11/09/2004~
Wow, what a response, by now most of you have been informed of Pia’a match by someone from our team. It has been overwhelming to see the wonderful emails that you have all been sending, let alone all the well wishes on our sign-up board…THANK YOU…THANK YOU ALL…for taking a chance on us. As you know, we beat the odds on finding our match (some said it could not be done), and again, it’s all thanks to the countless individuals that came out and got tested, spread the word, and even held donor drives at their, homes, temples, universities and even their place of employment.

So what’s next, well we have been very busy getting tests done prior to the transplant date (preconditioned testing). Everyday is full of exams, meetings with the various medical teams and caregiver classes. The folks here in Seattle have been great, we have met so many wonderful people who just want to help and be a part of the next phase of our journey. Thank you all for wanting to help.

This past weekend, we had some great news. You might remember we launched the “Just Do Something Program”, well the Payaliya Dance Studio Fundraiser (led by their director, Trupti Patel), raised $4,000 for the Matchpia.org campaign, in a matter of hours at their performance last Sunday evening. Not only that, but they also got 30+ new donors tested at the performance. Hats off to Trupti Patel and her students for going the extra mile, and participating in the “Just Do Something Program”…You guys “Did Something, and Did it Well”.

Just remember, there are another 35 patients that need our help, so we welcome anyone to help. Whether you want to get tested, do a drive or hold a fundraiser… just remember to “Just Do Something”.

Lastly, a message to our donor, whoever you are… Thank you and may god bless you for your “Act of Kindness”, may you set the example to all the potentialo donors out there the importance of being COMMITED and AVAILABLE to save a LIFE.

~Posted on 11/05/2004~
Well our dream has come true, Pia has a donor match. Not just any match, but an Identical Match…it sounds too good to be true, but we defeated the odds against us. You see our chance for a match was 1 in 20,000 to 1 in a 100,000. Let alone 1 in a million for an identical match. I would like to personally thank everyone of you for all your sacrifices you made over the last 14 weeks for our cause, let alone the sheer dedication commitment you’ve made to Pia and all the other patients that need HOPE to get them through to the next day.

There was an individual who once told me early on that “Don’t hold your breath, as you will never find a match. You haven’t found one in two years, so why do you think you will find one now”. Well, no hard feelings, but my reply today is “ You should get to know my community better, see what we see, feel what we feel”.

At matchpia.org, our strategy, was to launch a very effective campaign that can touch everyone emotionally, whether you are a male or a female, a Hindu, Muslim, Sikh or Christian in our South Asian community. It doesn’t matter anymore, as the barriers of religion, needed to be broken-down in order to save lives in our community. Now the only thing that matters, is the compassion for HUMANITY, and all our commitment to sustain it.

As we enter this next phase of treatment, we are very cautious, as we have only addressed 2 of the 4 essential steps of this journey (1. Find a donor, 2. Convince that donor to donate, 3. Survive the transplant, and 4. Post transplant survival), we have so far accomplished steps 1 and 2.

So, as we continue to thank you all, we would like to share two themes about our community that was so evident in our campaign.

1) Total “act of kindness by strangers”…so many of you didn’t even know us or had a clue on what to do, and how to do it, but were kind enough to give us a chance to provide you an understanding of how to do a donor drive…you took a chance on us…complete strangers whom you did not know.
2) The notion “If you educate Humanity, Humanity will rise to the occasion”…this campaign has demonstrated that once people were educated on what bone marrow is, and the process involved to save a LIFE…the choice is simple.

So what’s next, well Pia and I thought long and hard what to do, and we decided to continue our efforts with Matchpia.org, in bringing awareness on the importance of getting members of our South Asian Community tested. You see, complete strangers took a chance on us, and we will continue to do the same for all the other 35 South Asian patients (I personally speak to about 8 of the families everyday). As you view our website, you may have noticed that we have recruited 12, 442 donors, in 188 donor drives, in 83 cites, in 14 weeks…. according to the NMDP, that will facilitate 6 South Asian transplants a year for the next 10 years.

So we are so proud of each and everyone of you who joined our campaign, whether you volunteered for the day, spread the news to your friends and family or got tested at a drive…YOU MADE A DIFFERENCE for Pia and all the other 35 South Asian patients.

On a final, but a very important note, I would like to encourage everyone of you to join our efforts in enabling our campaign to continue, so far we have personally spent over $83, 846 to support the marketing efforts and donor drives for this campaign. A few weeks ago, we have started the “South Asian Marrow Foundation Fund”, with the Marrow Foundation in Washington, DC. Now anyone can contribute to this fund and get a charitable tax deduction (tax exempt # 41-1704734), as our fund is housed under the Marrow Foundation tax-exempt status.

The proceeds of the funds will enable us to conduct MORE donor drives in the South Asian Community, defray some of the additional tissue typing cost related to further testing for patients and some of the additional expenses in finding donor matches for South Asian patients. Please help us to raise the funds we need to effectively continue this campaign (if you have a matching program at your employer for charitable contributions, please let your HR manager you want the funds to be matched to the “South Asian Marrow Foundation”).

Again, thank you so much for all your kind generosity, determination and sacrifices for the last 14 weeks. All your efforts allowed Pia to get her “one in a million chance”, at a miracle.

Most important, I would like to thank our donor (who ever you are), for being so selfless in giving Pia and I chance at life. I can not begin to think of all the courage and strength it must took to go through this donation process. We (Pia and I, our families, friends and all the volunteers and donors), will be ever inspired by our strength and courage to give Pia “The Gift of Life”.

~Posted on 11/01/2004~
We finally made it to Seattle, what a vibrant upbeat city. The people are so friendly and courteous. Our day starts with many meetings at the hospital, meeting with all the wonderful medical staff at Fred Hutch. It is amazing to see all the experience and knowledge they bring to the table. From the onset, you can see the sincere compassion and commitment each member of our medical team has for our treatment.

With just a day or two under in Seattle, I was asked to attend the annual National Marrow Donor Program (NMDP), council meeting held in Minneapolis, Minnesota. What a treat it was to meet with all the donor centers members who have been so dedicated in doing donor drives for Matchpia.org. It was great to finally put all the names to the faces. Even a real treat, to meet all the Committee and Board members that have also been instrumental in supporting our program. There were several very interesting educational sessions that took place to broaden our understanding of the NMDP mission.

I had dinner with a bunch of folks from the New England, Carolina’s and Los Angeles Donor Centers. What a experience to see all the passion and commitment they all had for the Matchpia.org Campaign. Most of these donor centers have helped us to do drives, but also championed the whole South Asian crisis in their communities…THANK YOU ALL.

A very special thanks two Board members who not only believe in our cause, but also have become our greatest supporters…Mutzi and Edgar…Thank you very much, for listening to all the challenges and barriers we face as minorities to the Registry. You guys have demonstrated to us your commitment to Matchpia.org, day in and day out. You guys represent true Leaders.

Lastly, I want to encourage you all to help baby Varun. Yes, Varun is going into transplant at Duke (cord blood). His parents just got up and moved to North Carolina, in the chances to save his life. We are looking for volunteers at Duke and UNC Chapel Hill to help the family out, while they spend the next 6 months in a new state. Volunteers can be used to do errands, help out with support at the hospital, or just someone to talk to. If you think you can help, please send an email to
info@matchpia.org

~Posted on 10/24/2004~
Weekend went by so quickly, we have been so busy doing drives and planning for our next trip to Seattle (Fred Hutch Cancer Care Center). It was so good to see all of our friends, family and supporters last Friday night. Thank you all for your wonderful surprise at the W Hotel. Pia and I were so surprised and hearth felt to see so many people wishing us the best that life can bring us. I thank you all for sharing all your love and support for us, and the Matchpia.org Campaign.

~Posted on 10/22/2004~
What a night, I want to tell you guys about some very special people that have entered Pia and my life, and moreover the Matchpia.org campaign. You may have seen one of our recent promotions with Bombay Dreams (getting awareness of this South Asian crisis to our community), that we have been working on with a wonderful cast of performers.

There’s a fellow by the name of Manu Narayan (playing the role of Akaash), who not only is the lead actor in the show, but a leader by example to our South Asian community. You see, when we first presented the idea of him being part of a group of young South Asian actors and actresses who want to make a difference for our cause, he immediately got excited to help out.

Since then, we have spent countless hours and days with Manu the last month shooting our series of Public Service Announcement (PSA’s), on getting tested to become a committed donor on the Registry. Through this experience not only has he become on of our greatest “Champions” for the cause, but also a committed registered donor himself. Manu’s sheer passion as an artist not only comes out in his stage performance, but in his day to day performance in spreading the word to his fellow cast members, and other members of the South Asian community, on the importance of getting tested. THANK YOU Manu!!!

Next, there is another wonderful person from the cast Bombay Dreams, actually she is one of the lead actresses (she plays the role of Rani on the show), Ayesha Dharker. Another example, of a selfless contributor who brings sheer passion and excitement for our cause. Once Manu mentioned the importance of South Asians getting tested, Ayesha, jumped at the opportunity to help us spread the awareness. Since the day we meet her, until just recently when she left on her next assignment in the UK, she has been nothing but focused in helping us getting the word out on our cause. Ayesha, will also be in one of the upcoming PSA’s supporting the Matchpia.com Campaign. THANK YOU Ayesha, for being so supportive to the cause.

Lastly, there is another fellow by the name of Kalpen Modi, who also joined the ranks of you South Asian artists who believe in the Matchpia.org Campaign. Kal flew in from LA to join the celebrity cast from Bombay Dreams to be part of our PSA series. Let me tell you, he is just as funny in person, as he is in the movies, a new side of him I haven’t seen in his films. It’s so easy to see the serious passion and devotion he has to this cause. You see, Kal used to do donor recruitment drives during his college campus days in California, so naturally, he know the importance of find donor matches for our South Asian patients. What can I say Kal, THANK YOU for believing in the cause, and contributing time from your busy shooting schedule.


~Posted on 10/21/2004~
The seasons are changing, and another year is passing by. It’s so ironic that I have stopped to measure time by days and months but rather seasons (since this illness started more that two years ago). Pia and I got a chance to go out to a very small Italian place in “Hell’s Kitchen” in New York, one would never notice the place unless their cab stopped right in front of it. The ambiance was so simple and but cozy.

It was like reliving the younger years when we first were dating, as the sparkle in Pia’s eyes still glimmered with sheer strength. For a few hours, nothing meant anything but us enjoying each other’s company…it was cool to have time to ourselves for once.

~Posted on 10/20/2004~
Yes, the rumors are correct (a lot of people have been asking me), I did resign from my job 5 weeks ago, to become the South Asian “Defender of the Faith”, for this cause. I didn’t know what else to have done, to make this cause more real and keep the momentum going forward. I think the folks are worried on how Pia and I will make it financially. Actually most people have tried to talk me out of it, but in a weird way, in order to “practice what I preach”, this was the only way to do it. And in these five weeks, I’ve never felt better about myself, knowing now it is even more in our hands (our team and committed donors), to bring more outreach to the community in educating people of the importance of being a committed and available donor.

~Posted on 10/18/2004~
What a weekend, we were able to do 9 drives in the last week having added another 1,132 donors into the Registry. And another South Asian patient has joined our campaign to find a match, another example of how you just don't know when cancer can creep up. I am so Happy to see Pia enjoying life as a normal person at home this week, good to see her enjoy the little things in life that us non-patients take advantage of everyday (like just taking a walk around the yard, or smelling the sent of fresh flowers).

It was such an honor to be summoned to the Swaminarayan Temple
in New Jersey. Uncle Raja was so nice to provide us his support for this cause going forward. There were 262 donors in a matter of 6 hours that knew about Pia and the importance of being tested...Thanks everyone for being so thoughtful in supporting the cause. Remember, it's not really about the numbers of donors, as much the committed individuals that are ready to donate when called upon

And a big thanks to everyone that has been helping us to raise funds for the South Asian Marrow Foundation, any amount donated can help us to keep this cause going. We actually had a person who came to get tested yesterday just pull out their checkbook and started to write $1000 check to the cause...Thank you sir for your generously.

We are hoping that we meet our goal of 12,000 donors be next week, as that will put us at the 20% donor mark (we have added an additional 20% South Asians to the NMDP Registry since our campaign started 13 weeks ago).

~Posted on 10/15/2004~
The day started with the phones ringing nonstop, people want to know what they can do to help educate this potential donor in the UK to donate for our US South Asian patient. People are ready to call the media, their friends and relatives in the UK, someone even wanted to fly out to the UK and put ads on the billboards on the streets. Thank you all for being so supportive for this patient, but remember, we cannot coarse anyone to do something they don’t want to. All we can do is hope that this potential donor has been informed properly on what the involvement is in donating.

Here in the US, we at Matchpia.org, ensure all our drives communicate the same message. We make sure all our potential donors are educated on the process, become committed to the process and most importantly available to donate if called upon. So all the steps we have been taking in our drives, will hopefully prevent situations like the one we are facing today with our South Asian patient in the US.

Thank you all for your feedback and well wishes today, and I and members of Matchpia.org welcome all your ideas to make our cause better. We cannot serve our community, if we don’t know what our community needs, so keep the feedback coming. Also, thank you very much to our anonymous donor. Your large donation to the South Asian Marrow Foundation Fund, will enable us to continue our outreach programs.

~Posted on 10/14/2004~
Well where do I begin, it has been a long 12 and a half weeks since we began this journey for Pia. From the minute I got in my SUV and drove from New York to Baltimore, Maryland to do my first drive, to now, where I am talking with US Congressional and Senate Leaders on the importance of passing legislation for Outreach Programs for not just the South Asian Community, but for all the minority communities. I thank you all for giving me the inspiration and strength to move this cause forward, my family, my friends and the complete strangers that took a chance for Pia and this cause.

Well by now, you must have heard of how Pia fought furiously the last few weeks to become better from her stay at the hospital. It was difficult to see her so sick and sad being away from home (especially Alli our adopted daughter). We were lucky to beat it, especially when afterwards, we were really told how severe it really was for Pia. It was rough for me, as I was just on my way back from Capital Hill, meeting with the leaders of our country, to learn Pia was admitted into the hospital.

The first few nights were very long and scary, as I hadn’t had any idea what to expect (you see after chemotherapy, a patient has no immune system until there marrow produces healthy blood again). And typically, the last two years of his disease, Pia never really got so sick after having chemotherapy. This is usually a time where everyone has to be very careful when being around a patient (you may have to wear gloves, a mask, wash your hands thoroughly and certainly avoid being around a patient if you are not well yourself).

The last few days were pretty tough too, as our cause has gotten bigger and bigger, now a lot of time is spent talking to the families of the other 31 patients and the various NMDP centers setting up donor drives. It is these families I pray for every night, to give them the strength and drive to make it to the next day. In some way, I feel so responsible in representing each one of these patients’ families, as I know the feeling of hopelessness these families feel thinking they are alone.

When we started this journey, we knew no one in the South Asian Community that was going through what we were. Let alone, it is not accepted to talk about a cancerous disease openly in our South Asian Society. So everyday I tell these family members, it’s ok to talk about it, it’s ok to know you are not alone…letting them know that I am willing to take a chance in helping them, as complete strangers took a chance on Pia and I.

So the battle goes on, and we go onto another day, which will bring us closer to a match for one of our South Asian patients. For I truly belief tomorrow is worth living for, and Life is a wonderful THING when you have so many people who are supporting you along the way.

~Posted on 10/13/2004~
Based on so many of our well wishers asking how I am doing, and what I’m feeling, Pia and I have decided to provide an update to everyone from a Caregivers perspective. In doing so, we hope everyone will get a better feel for what it is like from this side of the fence. Starting tomorrow, my thoughts will complement Pia’s experiences, in giving everyone a more holistic view of our journey with this disease.